tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33461864006092159302024-03-04T22:12:35.490-08:00A Bad Thinking HabitSnigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-82729780424368496182019-08-21T23:24:00.002-07:002019-08-21T23:33:50.603-07:00Life Update: So Far So Good!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It has been almost exactly two years since I wrote here, and for good reason - it has been a roller-coaster ride that changed my life in many ways!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">To give you a quick recap, I left my job as a software developer in Citi in 2017 to look for something more akin to my areas of interest. It was a big risk at the time but by a stroke of luck, a friend from BITS-Pilani referred me to his organization, and I began what was the most enriching professional experience of my life. Talk about rewards for taking a risk!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The organization that I joined was India Leaders for Social Sector (ILSS), a non-profit start-up, launched in 2017, that helped senior corporate professionals prepare for and secure leadership positions in the social impact space. We were a small team of 3 highly passionate and very different people, but somehow, through struggle, hustle and what I feel was parent-like ownership, we took it from an idea on a paper to a community of 85+ highly accomplished professionals working on social change.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLuU0Cf9FRfavCWmPbHI1tsaUXfmJeuj6NPxKCq9ZoxALR_o13gGkB94dey_y0ULf7uyLq52tFrq_a6yTuBjUcdjE-yMcX3fAMLnVRAqQAFGKfT_Tt9TNkZBQLo-pzKRNG2hicXh1ICz4l/s1600/IMG_20180702_141115__01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="764" data-original-width="1600" height="152" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLuU0Cf9FRfavCWmPbHI1tsaUXfmJeuj6NPxKCq9ZoxALR_o13gGkB94dey_y0ULf7uyLq52tFrq_a6yTuBjUcdjE-yMcX3fAMLnVRAqQAFGKfT_Tt9TNkZBQLo-pzKRNG2hicXh1ICz4l/s320/IMG_20180702_141115__01.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The experience opened my eyes in more ways than one - I was brought face to face with my own privilege, something which I now tend to lecture my other friends about. I got the opportunity to meet fantastic people from the social sector - professors from Harvard, activists, philanthropists, social entrepreneurs. Meeting these accomplished yet very warm people was humbling, but also made me aware of the immense possibilities out there. As it was a start-up, one ended up doing everything it took to make things happen - whether it was unloading cargo at 2 am on a freezing cold night, or presenting in front of an audience of 100+ people (perspiring tremendously while at it), or just ensuring that the rooms of all our participants had mosquito repellants. I remember hangers being a contentious issue for more than one leadership programs that we organized. </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">But it was also about the big picture stuff - deciding the strategy for reaching out to more people, dealing with vendors, making tough decisions on what we should do and what we shouldn't, trying to get a PR release, budgeting. My incredible mentor also taught me how to think with a mentality of abundance, and how love, justice and kindness really go a long way in building relationships, which is kind of the most important thing for any organization, whether it's a non-profit or a corporate firm. Tomorrow, ILSS begins its 6th leadership program, and the first one without me! While I am dealing with a severe case of FOMO, my heart fills with joy as I see ILSS soaring upwards and onwards.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So why am I not there? Well, much has changed in the last 4 months as I realized two huge aspirations in life - one personal, and the other professional.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On the personal front, I got married to my bae of 8 years. It warmed my heart to see all our friends and family flying down from all over the world to see us cross over to the other side. Is the grass greener on the other side? I guess so, but I know that my husband (whoa!) and I would be ready with a hose to really water any brown patches that ever appear (early mornings really make me come up with weird analogies). Nevertheless, I am excited about this journey with my companion of 8 years, who I am truly grateful for. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On the professional front, my little-girl dream of studying at INSEAD is finally coming true. I still remember how excited about INSEAD my father was, when he came back from a training held there. I had made a mental note to get into this B-school he had been raving about, but little did I realise how laborious the road to getting in would be. Through rejections, self-worth doubts, anxiety attacks but also persistence, I finally made it here, and with a scholarship. A week into the INSEAD experience at Fontainebleau (a quaint town in France), I can see why it is a big deal - the exposure to the wide experiences of your peers is truly valuable. Like ILSS, I am sure this experience is going to broaden my perspective, and I guess that's the point of any big step in life. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And while I haven't exactly won an Oscar, I feel the need to thank the people who stood by me through my efforts to achieve this dream. Anyone who knew me, and knew me well, knew that international B-school education has been my long-cherished goal. My parents and brother have seen me go through rounds of rejections and worries about fees but have been my biggest cheerleaders and support system. My husband and best friends had to bear hours and hours of venting about the process, and kept reminding me that 'apna time aega'. Then there were those mentors and friends who reviewed my essays at very very short notices, and really prepared me for interviews, my colleague who calmed me down when I broke down in the office due to fear of missing the deadline, the gracious mentors who gave wonderful recommendations. I guess it takes a village to send someone to B-school, and I was lucky to have these people beside me. Thank you folks, you know who you are.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So why did I choose to blog today? Well, life has been good to me, and I am grateful for that. The next year is going to be super-tough and hectic: I just saw the schedule and I guess my blood would soon be 70% coffee. While I may not really get the time to write more frequently, I thought a new beginning in life is also a good time for renewing your interests. Because if ILSS was pivotal in life, INSEAD is a pit-stop - a chance to refuel, recharge and renew yourself for the next dream. Now let's go get that degree, which seems to be a tougher deal than getting in! But, so far, so good!</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-66958898971338571242017-10-17T20:30:00.003-07:002017-10-17T22:23:07.251-07:00#MeToo<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8ZaYnq8tCzRbUo5tN6T9tvLoUMLlzHttq6wyTAtGOe5ufufLJRdgTCmptAwu7Zo3YckWb9uqI2QDFPnWgUG0jckuIrAV5cCI-7B-sr8NvRuVZbEqgHs-x1B27uMJEvQ-Rtr-MOuhJZmRB/s1600/metoo+4.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><img border="0" data-original-height="733" data-original-width="1100" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8ZaYnq8tCzRbUo5tN6T9tvLoUMLlzHttq6wyTAtGOe5ufufLJRdgTCmptAwu7Zo3YckWb9uqI2QDFPnWgUG0jckuIrAV5cCI-7B-sr8NvRuVZbEqgHs-x1B27uMJEvQ-Rtr-MOuhJZmRB/s320/metoo+4.jpg" width="320" /></span></a><span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">It was a typical morning – I woke up after hitting the snooze button of my alarm for the tenth time, and as per my daily ritual, groggily opened the Facebook app on my phone. A couple of memes later, I saw the first #metoo post on my newsfeed. “If we use this hashtag enough, we might be able to demonstrate the magnitude of this problem called sexual harassment”. To be honest, my initial reaction was condescending sarcasm – “Yes, posting on my Facebook timeline will make the lecherous autowallahs at Huda City Center take note of my plight”. I didn’t believe and am still cautious of the notion that talking about the issue on social media could affect any real change. I decided not to participate in this trend – there was no point digging up repressed memories, the whole thing would die out anyway, and we will be back to square one. Clearly, inside this woman who loves to give positive gyaan, there resides a cynical feminist.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">But it didn’t die down. Over the next few hours, scores of female friends kept posting stories of how they were molested by servants, drivers and even relatives – a lot of these incidents happened when they were kids. The women described how they were groped and abused, in crowded areas and so-called safe spaces, by people they trusted, inclusive of friends, cousins and uncles. I was much discomforted by these stories – partly because I feared that they would feed the voyeuristic tendencies of our society (remember how graphically we discussed the details of the Nirbhaya rape), but majorly because much of it was relatable. By evening, I was seething with anger and buzzing with thoughts.</span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpcSv1fGroZ07gHlImo6qi74ZMVVyNzH8lH9HE4rleH6BvzXIro4NOtuT24jdzetsvBLIpU0hvrq6molvFhcuFTSHPh7Flb5E_1NYXoIw1WblYxPD8vzc5QF750kIrGI8pU2Y6kMqcye1k/s1600/metoo+1.jpeg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><img border="0" data-original-height="267" data-original-width="189" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpcSv1fGroZ07gHlImo6qi74ZMVVyNzH8lH9HE4rleH6BvzXIro4NOtuT24jdzetsvBLIpU0hvrq6molvFhcuFTSHPh7Flb5E_1NYXoIw1WblYxPD8vzc5QF750kIrGI8pU2Y6kMqcye1k/s200/metoo+1.jpeg" width="141" /></span></a><span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">I felt that the #metoo campaign may not give people a sense of how big this issue is, and honestly, one shouldn’t need a full-blown campaign to realize that an invasion of personal space is wrong. But the campaign could sensitize people about the behavior or habits women adopt to prevent repeat instances of such incidents. For example, the reason women go to mall/station washrooms in pairs is not to gossip about guys (don’t believe everything movies tell you and read about the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bechdel_test">Bechdel Test</a>). Often, it is to be a guard against a creep we may encounter in the corridor that leads to the restroom. Do women pack a huge suitcase? Ask them how many clothes in there are a supposedly safer/more appropriate alternative to what they really want to wear. We set multiple alarms on an overnight bus/train journey so that we don’t sleep too deeply. We are willing to pay more and take a longer route in an Uber just so that we stay on the main road. We don’t take the cheap 5 AM flights because we would have to commute at 3 AM. Many parents don’t allow all-girls trips to places with low phone connectivity. It is not about one or two incidents; it is about major lifestyle changes that come as a result of the unsafe environment created by our perpetrators. We move on but don’t really forget.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">I was amazed by the shock expressed by some of my male friends. How did they not know that sexual harassment is pretty common? What kind of utopia were they living in? Why did it take a friend to come forward for them to realize that it is serious (kind of reminded me of A Wednesday)? Would they still be as sympathetic if a Barkha Dutt or a Sagarika Ghose or a Sunny Leone came up with such stories? I know many of these shocked men did not empathize when Barkha Dutt told her experience. I also laughed at the disbelief people showed on finding out that students from “elite” colleges also misbehaved with their friends. As if education or class determined character. I recall a supposedly bright college-mate who dismissed clearly inappropriate behavior as playful banter. Harassment is so normalized that people don’t even realize when they are indulging in it.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">I was also annoyed by some folks who were dismissing the campaign on the grounds that feminists are neglecting men who have been abused. Firstly, it’s not a competition. Secondly, it is an opportunity for men to come out and share stories of how they were abused but their cries were not heeded. Many men have done so, though it’s a shame that there are some who make fun of it. I’d like to know if they would find it funny if something like that happened to their children. Thirdly, and most importantly, sexual harassment is not about a gender – it is about the inherent patriarchy that hurts men and women alike. It is about using your power and privilege against someone who could not speak up, whether it is a child who didn’t know what got him or a girl who would be shamed for being molested. </span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">So where does this leave us? What could this campaign possibly accomplish? What could be done to ensure that fewer people have to go through such harrowing experiences?</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">My first thought is that we make sex education and liberal arts mandatory. We need sex education to promote a healthy attitude towards sex, and we need liberal arts to introduce people to concepts of chauvinism, justice, postmodernism. I believe we need to teach these more than we need to teach the ABCs. There is a difference between literacy, education and enlightenment, and we need to have enlightened citizens who respect and value each other. We need citizens who understand personal rights and boundaries, who appreciate an individual’s thoughts and beliefs, and who could question regressive practices. One can learn subjects and skills at any stage of their life, but they need to develop a liberal and respectful mindset before they are conditioned by a patriarchal society. We must proactively demand these topics in the school curriculum.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">Secondly, let’s stop victim shaming. We have all been guilty of doing this at some point of our life, but we can check ourselves in the future. Now that the campaign has established that molesters don’t care for clothes, age or time of the day, let us stop blaming the one who suffered. I’d also urge people to speak up, for themselves and others. The men for whom this has been a revelation could be more alert about harassment happening around them – abuse could be as simple and obscure an act as lingering on a woman’s hands while exchanging currency or purposefully bumping into a woman. Be alert, and call out those who feel there would be no consequences.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">Thirdly, let’s be aware and informed citizens. Let us understand the rights and legal remedies that the Constitution offers us. Let us hold our authorities accountable for not preventing or punishing such unlawful behavior, and let us not be afraid of reporting it. And it’s not always upon the system to protect us, or keep us in check. The next time you are assigned a training about sexual harassment, go through it attentively, seriously and proactively. Don’t just do it to check the boxes. Ask your organization about <a href="http://www.business-standard.com/article/current-affairs/sexual-harassment-at-workplace-what-are-vishakha-guidelines-113112300188_1.html">Vishakha guidelines</a>. Don’t suggest someone who files a sexual harassment complaint to change departments or companies – it will only encourage the offender.</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">Finally, let’s empathize. I hope I won’t have to explain again why having a women’s coach in the metro is a good idea. I hope we won’t laugh when a guy is almost raped in a movie (e.g. <a href="https://www.beingindian.com/featured/badrinath-ki-dulhaniya-assault-men-not-funny">Badrinath ki Dulhaniya</a>). I hope we won’t disregard a celebrity’s experience as a publicity stunt. I hope we won’t tell our friends that they are making mountains out of molehills. I hope HR professionals won’t suggest internal mobility for a woman who complains of sexual harassment. And I sure hope we won’t write-off feminism as an unnecessary fad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-68534284144925252932017-08-08T10:09:00.000-07:002017-08-08T10:12:12.481-07:00Of Bandhan & Raksha<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><b>Thoughts on Bandhan:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Yesterday, on 7<sup>th</sup> August 2017,
India celebrated Raksha-Bandhan, a festival that has for the longest time
replenished my pocket money and chocolate stash. This unique festival that
celebrates the loving (and quarrelling) bond between a brother and a sister has
been my favorite since I was a little kid. And no, it’s not (just) because as
per tradition I get gifts and money from my brothers in exchange for handmade rakhis
(a rather handsome deal, I must admit). It’s because Raksha Bandhan is a
celebration of your family, of your siblings and cousins, something tangible,
unlike other festivals where God becomes the center of attention.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">My earliest memories of Raksha-Bandhan
are from Lucknow. We would go to my grandparents’ house, where numerous first
and second cousins across generations would come together to celebrate the
occasion. There would be multiple rounds of rakhi-tying and a dozen boxes of Kalakand,
and there would be much fanfare. There still is, but it’s been a long time
since my brother, Aniruddh and I were in town for the celebration. In fact, it’s
been a long time, 8 years in fact, since Aniruddh and I have been in the same
town for Raksha-Bandhan – ever since I left home for hostel and then work.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhizw3R2A_ZMnVkIupXIL-VbRFCbe8bKKxjV3PxtRaUGwzPAVGKYo6NBqWw_PIJjRO4r0LHhoES22ncZBvffIP_4ohPYCJgKuGmThJUh5NBMORmM_ozgHJX9-rlZ2hkYkHfX85ok9kAdOSc/s1600/dexter.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="688" data-original-width="1600" height="137" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhizw3R2A_ZMnVkIupXIL-VbRFCbe8bKKxjV3PxtRaUGwzPAVGKYo6NBqWw_PIJjRO4r0LHhoES22ncZBvffIP_4ohPYCJgKuGmThJUh5NBMORmM_ozgHJX9-rlZ2hkYkHfX85ok9kAdOSc/s320/dexter.jpg" width="320" /></span></a><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Ironically, it’s in the last 8 years
that our friendship has become stronger. We were never the “Hum Sath Sath Hain”
type of siblings – we were always fighting with each other, unless one of us
needed something from our parents, when we fought together. I used to break his
action figures, and he used to give me karate chops. We spoke to each other
only with sarcasm (still do), and used to sneak into the kitchen for a piece of
cake during the afternoon, when Mom slept until our argument about the size of
the piece would wake her up. But in the past 8 years, living miles apart, we
have grown closer – we advise each other about careers and cocktails, keep each
other’s secrets from our parents and also pulled off an epic prank on them.
Raksha Bandhan, now, is just another excuse to call each other and discuss
family gossip. </span><br />
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">We love each other, in our own weird way, and who needs a rakhi
to be reminded of it?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><b>Thoughts on Raksha:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Traditionally, Raksha Bandhan is
about a promise that the brother makes to his sister – that he will always
protect her. This time around, I saw advertisements about sisters who protected
their brothers. In the case of me and Aniruddh, it is tough to ascertain who
protects whom – most of the time it is our parents who are protecting us, from
the world, and very often, from each other.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">The concept of “raksha” has obvious patriarchal
roots, that a man is needed to protect a woman. Most women, from urban
educated families at least, are living independently and they have learnt how to take
care of themselves. If siblings live miles apart, like Aniruddh and I do, one
can’t really expect the Bhai to be around for the Behen’s raksha. Some would
say that it’s about time that the patriarchal idea of “raksha” gets officially
retired.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Except that we are still living in a
patriarchal society, where a woman who is driving back from somewhere at
midnight is stalked and harassed by drunken men, high on male privilege and influence.
We are still living in a society where the female is questioned for being out
at night, and shamed just for having male friends or getting a drink. We are in
a society where the lack of a “related male escort” at night makes you an easy
target for potential maulers and rapists who would justify their act on account
of you not having a “related man” to “protect” you. But, would having “related
men” – brothers, fathers, husbands, fiancées – with us make us automatically
safe? I doubt that. In fact, none of us would have the men in our lives put in
dangerous situations just because they are men – our Bhais are not exactly
Bajrangi Bhaijaans who can take on goons and hoodlums by themselves. Those familiar
with the story of <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.in/2016/05/05/keenan-rueben_n_9845376.html" target="_blank">Keenan and Reuben</a> from Mumbai know that the presence of a
male protector does nothing to a crowd of molesters. And there are more such <a href="http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/Mumbai-molestation-victims-recount-horror/articleshow/2671478.cms" target="_blank">examples</a> in recent memory. So who can give us “raksha”?</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCaP-DOIdvl3z14Q67Heq0-qFQO6zp7KaLhyh2Z8e9jMyxKoB6VcPz4Fb-H4wTCzAk99exLbfj8E3txVi_IcssGwWDpg-gygPjuZaAinAv43IIsuSf306b0kQYzzs6hq561D29uLE-h8fC/s1600/One-Stop-Center-Scheme.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="338" data-original-width="602" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCaP-DOIdvl3z14Q67Heq0-qFQO6zp7KaLhyh2Z8e9jMyxKoB6VcPz4Fb-H4wTCzAk99exLbfj8E3txVi_IcssGwWDpg-gygPjuZaAinAv43IIsuSf306b0kQYzzs6hq561D29uLE-h8fC/s320/One-Stop-Center-Scheme.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Keeping in mind the thought behind
this festival, rakhis are also sent to soldiers, police officers, and as people
can see from various photo-ops, to many major politicians. Recent events have
clearly demonstrated that the latter might just be the people you need raksha
from. It’s up to the rest of the government machinery, the police, the
bureaucrats and the judicial system, to do their job properly. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">And they shouldn’t
need rakhis to be reminded of it.</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-24900209903865961972017-05-14T13:58:00.000-07:002017-05-14T14:02:16.134-07:00Mother's Day Special!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">It’s that time of the year again,
when our news feeds are spilling with selfies of our friends with their mothers,
and companies are bending over backwards to bring out ads saluting the spirit
of a mother. Having had long WhatsApp discussions with my brother about what to
gift my mom this year (and </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">eventually sticking to the good old flowers), and
having finally found and uploaded a picture in which both Mom and I look good,
I sat down to think of what Mother’s Day is really about.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiho4oSvRY_GQsBRltCDF6-IZx2Cesm2f0BMPUPztVuW1izWJ3A59a76pcTwwKM2gtXivhkYxu4HdjyRbTRZozwVMVxXY0cyP0MMF34GBOm9zWo5tTZqjAII6TmyQsa2X0M9x_JzWcugB65/s1600/mothers+day+selfie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiho4oSvRY_GQsBRltCDF6-IZx2Cesm2f0BMPUPztVuW1izWJ3A59a76pcTwwKM2gtXivhkYxu4HdjyRbTRZozwVMVxXY0cyP0MMF34GBOm9zWo5tTZqjAII6TmyQsa2X0M9x_JzWcugB65/s320/mothers+day+selfie.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
</div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Interestingly, the origin of Mother’s
Day is not as cheerful as the holiday itself. The inspiration behind Mother’s
Day was a lady called Ann Jarvis, who lived in Virginia during the mid 1800s.
Ann Jarvis bore about a dozen children over a period of 17 years, but only four
survived childhood diseases like measles and typhoid, and unsanitary
conditions. As someone who had experienced immense loss due to poor health and
sanitary conditions, Ann began Mother’s Day Work Clubs which aided and educated
families to reduce infant mortality. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">During the American Civil War (1861-1865),
Virginia broke into Western Virginia, and saw some of the earliest conflicts.
Both the Union and Confederate suffered huge losses, and Ann’s Mother’s Day
Clubs started working for the soldiers of both the camps. Ann Jarvis felt
deeply for the mothers who had lost their sons to the war. After the war ended,
she organized “Mothers Friendship Day” for soldiers from both sides and their
families, to start the healing process. She had always wished for someone to
start a day to honor mothers. After her death in 1905, her daughter Anna Jarvis
took it upon herself to fulfill the wish.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Three years after her mother’s
death, Anna Jarvis organized a special memorial service in honor of mothers.
She also sent five hundred white carnations, which were her mother’s favorite
flowers, to all those who had attended the service. She campaigned vigorously
to make Mother’s Day first a national holiday in the US and then an
international holiday. In 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed a proclamation
making the second Sunday of May as Mother’s Day. But Anna’s happiness about
this was short-lived.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0qlWQ_gzQvAg_pcUVUPA2gwFCHIEKe-Reh8KdnAfsr3sIsU4V81hWmAKWaApJ1o7iPmzIyiNozzUByEGjMAz9fynZDzdsmUZ88RDe29nCG5Bf4U24pVCmwQ6XPhkGDGZ2pYLelPDkMBeD/s1600/anna.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0qlWQ_gzQvAg_pcUVUPA2gwFCHIEKe-Reh8KdnAfsr3sIsU4V81hWmAKWaApJ1o7iPmzIyiNozzUByEGjMAz9fynZDzdsmUZ88RDe29nCG5Bf4U24pVCmwQ6XPhkGDGZ2pYLelPDkMBeD/s320/anna.jpg" width="113" /></span></a></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">As is still prevalent, this
sentimental holiday was quickly commercialized, and greeting card, flower and confectionary
industries made immense profits from selling Mother’s Day special commodities.
Of course, we all see why! Even Facebook introduces the “Flower/Grateful
Reaction” in May, riding on the association of carnations with Mother’s Day.
Anyway, Anna Jarvis felt that these industries were exploiting the idea, and
felt that the ideal way to celebrate Mother’s Day was to actually pay her a
visit and spend quality time with her. She was so resentful of the
commercialization that she held protests to rescind the holiday. She was
arrested in 1948 for disturbing peace, and was reportedly placed in a sanatorium.
She dies a year later.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">While I understand the sentiments of
Anna Jarvis, I also feel that giving gifts, or even posting stuff on social
media is not a lesser way of celebrating the day, as long as you actually care
for your mother. Of course, it’s a personal choice – it’s completely acceptable
to not make a fuss out of it, and show your mom, and not the world, that you
love her. Many people are quick to judge people who are celebrating, or at
least posting about this day, calling it westernization of culture. And while
that may be true, it comes from a good place.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Now I won’t go all mushy about the
importance of mothers in one’s life – it is undeniable, and there are already
enough videos and songs doing that. It’s difficult to be on Facebook during
Mother’s Day weekend without feeling homesick. Add to it an online playlist
dedicated to the woman, especially with the song, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“tujhe sab hai pata, hai na ma!”</i>. I remember the first time I heard
the song, and saw its video. My family and I were watching the movie Taare
Zameen Par, from a DVD. When the song came up, I was crying, true to the label
of the emotional fool of the family. But when I turned around to see the
others, I found that I wasn’t alone. It really is a powerful song, and I felt
its effect again when I saw Shankar Mahadevan perform it during my college's cultural
fest. Getting thousands of young adults, who are looking to party, misty-eyed
at once is no small feat. But it’s not my favorite <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Ma wala gaana”.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">My favorite is this gem from
Khoobsurat, called <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVLgGkOcnYY&vl=en" target="_blank">“Ma ka phone aaya”</a>.</i>
It is symbolic of how crazy and intuitive our moms can be, calling us when
something is going wrong, especially when we are going wrong. It is also a
reminder of how terribly important it is to not miss her call, and the drama
that follows if you do. And that even our moms dread missing the calls from
their moms. The song is fun, like our friendship with our moms, and it makes
them human.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOHcfCUxUKLCsf-ydmVGaFNFI4IaOxlWeFzm-XTWag5wmMo2qTJrc-KTp85IJ9M4gw8ThrZFC9fKKNjVQOkucLx_IAkjoGVowPVaxEhE8euNC63rmAAvJI0gGSDxAFJVNT1QTVYYo_a6OC/s1600/mother.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOHcfCUxUKLCsf-ydmVGaFNFI4IaOxlWeFzm-XTWag5wmMo2qTJrc-KTp85IJ9M4gw8ThrZFC9fKKNjVQOkucLx_IAkjoGVowPVaxEhE8euNC63rmAAvJI0gGSDxAFJVNT1QTVYYo_a6OC/s320/mother.jpg" width="320" /></a><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">For a very long time, moms have been
idolized as symbols of selflessness and sacrifice. And don’t get me wrong, I do
believe that mothers give up a lot to bring us up. As I see some of my friends
and colleagues bear and have kids (with joy for them and dread for the process),
I realize that it takes immense strength and unlimited patience to raise
children. (Seriously, how does one do that?) But, if we constantly condition
them to become epitomes of sacrifice, or super-women, or goddesses, we take
away from them the freedom to be human, and make mistakes, and make choices
better suited to them than to their children. It makes us trivialize their
struggles, for we expect them to wear them as a badge of honor. If we start
seeing them as humans, and start taking our share of </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">responsibilities, we might
help them better than by singing odes to their love and courage. Of course, it
is easier said than done – it means we have to work, and not call Mom every
single time there is a confusion or difficulty (something I am very much guilty
of). But it might give our moms more time for themselves, and help us become
better children, and truly display the spirit of Mother’s Day.</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-89183823361885988562017-05-07T11:37:00.002-07:002017-05-07T12:22:00.648-07:00Depression As We Know It<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">A few weeks ago, I
woke up to news of another suicide from Kota, the coaching hub for entrance
exams. The news took me back to my own memories of entrance exam preparations,
and how horrid those days seemed in general. While we did put up brave faces despite
negative scores on mock tests, and had our share of fun at school, a lot of us
felt our confidence had eroded and some of us were deeply disturbed by the
intense pressure. As I mulled over the lack of psychological support provided
in India, and read stories of celebrities like Biswa Kalyan, or watched with
horror the popular series 13 Reasons Why, I realized that depression is even
more common in adults, who had never been taught to deal with the struggles of
life that often put dents in our souls. In fact, I know of more people who are
going through depression in their mid-20s, and that many more are fighting it
silently.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">In spite of depression
being such a common condition, it is only recently that people have started
talking about it, and opening up to their loved ones. However, a lot of us don’t
fully understand the reasons behind a friend’s depression, and often don’t know
how to support them. Wanting to do something about it, I rolled out a survey on
Facebook. The survey was short and anonymous, the major questions being:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 1.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-US">Age Group<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 2.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-US">Broad reason for depression<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 3.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-US">Did you overcome
it, and how?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 4.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-US">What could be done
to help people with depression?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">Sure enough, the
sample space was very limited, but I got 26 responses in 2-3 days. The number doesn’t
seem a lot, but it also means that there are at least 26 people in my friends
list who are going through or have suffered depression. It was also heartening
to see them open up, and put themselves in a vulnerable position by giving
fairly detailed responses, just so that people become more aware about this
condition. I truly appreciate them for their courage, and with this article, I
hope to bring their voices to the world by talking about the broad themes from
the survey.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">The age of depression<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">About 92% of the
respondents to my survey were in the age group of 19-30 years, which is
understandable since most of my acquaintances on Facebook fall in this age
group. But the majority of these respondents were depressed during their early
20s, the time most of us start living away from home. About 73% said that they
were depressed when they were between 19 and 24 years of age. Some 15% said
that they were suffering during adolescence, at the rebellious and complicated
age of 13-18 years. About 12% respondents said they were going through a tough
time during the time they were 25-35 years of age. Keeping aside the inherent
bias in the sample space, there clearly is a lot of unsaid struggle involved in
growing up, and this struggle is manifesting itself in unpleasant ways. So what
is it about growing up that is affecting us so much?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US" style="mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-no-proof: yes;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizfhRt3-WJTuydiv6pFhqNL9o8R9TAkeRHob03hiL9-0DMpIQGMHChU-WdKkemieTYMk-TBQQGE7GTyaul2PU5b3RZ699XcbCZGaDJpMXtQ01GtlWaYU4sDcj4e3MeEVq1TaMuTzFy3sqv/s1600/Age+Group+1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="120" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizfhRt3-WJTuydiv6pFhqNL9o8R9TAkeRHob03hiL9-0DMpIQGMHChU-WdKkemieTYMk-TBQQGE7GTyaul2PU5b3RZ699XcbCZGaDJpMXtQ01GtlWaYU4sDcj4e3MeEVq1TaMuTzFy3sqv/s200/Age+Group+1.png" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAqfYeTw2u7vUwbW-AfO0IdhYTMOubhx6Y8uaI7rHNQzyn557n_6cqoZsUqRFaHBks0WLxMUwm1DqWxu-xODmcZ4qZGg33CcmbgAo5diNpqD_PfPUEArPMBDxHZHdJTkoagdJYNpYH9Zy0/s1600/Age+Group+2.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="120" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAqfYeTw2u7vUwbW-AfO0IdhYTMOubhx6Y8uaI7rHNQzyn557n_6cqoZsUqRFaHBks0WLxMUwm1DqWxu-xODmcZ4qZGg33CcmbgAo5diNpqD_PfPUEArPMBDxHZHdJTkoagdJYNpYH9Zy0/s200/Age+Group+2.png" width="200" /></a></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">The culprits behind depression</span></span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">I was surprised to
find that the top contributor to depression was romantic relationships. It was
closely followed by peer pressure/identity crisis and career related pressures,
which were actually my top suspects. As I thought about these results, and read
some of the responses, I came up with certain theories about why these are the
top culprits behind depression.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqExC5QnLK1Bfukp7xZLDeFpqYtu_LE4E8nrSukRFepcNW7gCHKq0ThkhJrSoVYaNeY6NE2X3owqicbRUiPajJYIFrDSXulltTUlurwgDncRnM_MkOVMQfCKz-k08sDbEQ8Fak_wotWvJg/s1600/Reasons.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqExC5QnLK1Bfukp7xZLDeFpqYtu_LE4E8nrSukRFepcNW7gCHKq0ThkhJrSoVYaNeY6NE2X3owqicbRUiPajJYIFrDSXulltTUlurwgDncRnM_MkOVMQfCKz-k08sDbEQ8Fak_wotWvJg/s320/Reasons.png" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 1.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Romantic
Relationships</b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></span></i></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">We often dismiss
romantic relationships, especially during adolescence or early 20s, as unnecessary
distractions, as this is the age when we are supposed to “find ourselves”, “make
a career”, or “live freely”. But it is the most important thing on our minds,
at least for a significant fraction of our time. And while we tend to ascribe
it to growing sexual attraction, the need for romantic
relationships is often deeper than that. Of course, attraction is an essential
aspect of a romantic relationship, but the validation that comes from it goes a
long way in giving one a confidence boost. Yes, I know, we don’t need no
validation, but did we know that when we were freckled teenagers dealing with
body image issues? And the need for this validation goes beyond the physical.
Adolescence, and early 20s is usually when we are either rebelling or trying to
fit in, and either way we are lost. It helps to have a companion in all this
confusion, someone who is going through something similar circumstances, and is accepting you
with your imperfections. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">One would argue
that friends can do the same for you, but this is where Bollywood/Hollywood driven social
conditioning kicks in. From a very tender age, we have been seeing stories of
people who found a perfect partner, for whom one could say, like Tom Cruise, “You
complete me”. And as we start looking for a loyal companion, we hold on to that
ideal, even though the reality may be very different from our expectations. And
let’s not forget, even our significant others are going through a confusing
period in their lives. At this point, it is helpful to remember what Kate
Winslet says in this scene from the movie “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless
Mind”: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lvNGhBXTU0">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lvNGhBXTU0</a>
<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 2.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Peer pressure /
Identity crisis</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">As I mentioned
earlier, late teens to early 20s are the time when most of us are trying to
find ourselves. And more often than not, we find ourselves trying to fit in
within a group. There are a lot of internal conflicts going on. As we step out
of the comfort zone of our families, we are often face to face with a culture
shock, and it takes time to understand what our core values really are. Am I an
extrovert, or an introvert? Do I like taking risks and experiment, or do I like
making the comfortable choice? <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUR7iTQKVE-Cehg0rByGa1j9G4FJD2TtkBYCcJ3cw_C5UPxV3stKqj1mC16OVaKz63xFX_KkkKQpmioOQ2HVC3_gvZiLUcxH7fw7v987AuOOUi8gw7ohV4n2cAo8ag_nTIT52A0WjFnDdY/s1600/identity+crisis.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUR7iTQKVE-Cehg0rByGa1j9G4FJD2TtkBYCcJ3cw_C5UPxV3stKqj1mC16OVaKz63xFX_KkkKQpmioOQ2HVC3_gvZiLUcxH7fw7v987AuOOUi8gw7ohV4n2cAo8ag_nTIT52A0WjFnDdY/s320/identity+crisis.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">We also meet some
people that we look up to, and often change ourselves to like them. Our friend
circles also keep on changing, which is natural as people change. But these
relationships become all too important at the time, and indirectly affect how
confident we feel about ourselves. We see the filtered lives of our friends on social
media, and sometimes that also adversely affects how we see our own lives. And
while all of this is a part of growing up, there’s no outlet for teenagers and
young adults to share these insecurities. There are no guidance counsellors in
Indian schools, and not all families talk about feelings as much. I also
understand when more experienced adults say that you eventually get over it,
but clearly, these struggles affect some people more than others. And that is
enough for us to sit up and take notice.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 3.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Career related
pressures</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">We are all too
familiar with the professional expectations set in India – getting into the
best college (where the cut-off is sometimes even 99% marks), getting a
professional degree, getting a job that pays well and having a fancy title. In
the quest for all of this, there is hardly time to understand what your own
skill set and aspiration is. Of course, a lot has been </span></span><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">said about it, and
beautifully captured in books and movies like 3 Idiots and Tamasha, but sadly
not much has been done about it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">A contradictory
narrative is also building up these days – that of following your passion, and
doing what you love. This narrative judges you for doing a boring, corporate
job, and accuses you of being materialistic with no zest for life. While my
experience with people in the corporate world has been completely opposite, there’s an increasing
pressure to be “unique”. But where does this leave people who have not yet
found their passion? Or those for whom a certain lifestyle or income is
important?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">At the crux of this
conflict between a conventional career, and the road less traveled, are two
things – the definition of professional success, usually measured by the money
earned, and the lack of career counselling provided in schools. While there is
a lot of focus on certain subjects (read mathematics and science), and the
careers that they lead to (engineering and medicine), there is not enough focus
on others. The theory of multiple intelligences, by Howard Gardner, says there
are eight modalities of intelligence – then why do we work only on one? This
undue spotlight ends up burning students out, and often leads to depression.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 4.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Others</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">I had a host of
other reasons listed, including parental or marital issues. But one reason that
I missed out was “Health”, and seeing it in one of the responses stumped me,
because I, myself had gone through a brief period of medication-related depression.
Because somehow, we still haven’t started thinking of depression as a health
disorder. Diseases like PCOD and hypothyroidism often have depression as a
symptom. Medication for conditions like blood pressure, cholesterol, menopause
and even birth control list depression as a possible side-effect. We tend to forget
that our minds are also a part of our body, and depression is a mental illness,
not necessarily driven by external factors.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">Overcoming the Demon<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">I was happy to
learn that most of the respondents had learn to conquer, or at least keep at
bay, the demon of depression. About 77% respondents said they had gotten over
depression, while 11% said there while it was a recurring phenomenon, they had
learnt to tackle it. Some 12% said they were still depressed, and I would urge
them to keep believing in themselves, and take help if you need.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidNSFkucq7qnEzd9nhUv5d61yZN8vCuEjhTYxzcWoSpkZVW1lmiq6r5pPI_3xn3yVtzfRxEo-iYRRQo0d_B1uJDzuPcxw-kh6DazjVQn-42PQFOgRfp8_6Q8bCusqwanEsbd8tFs3hNsbP/s1600/Overcome.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidNSFkucq7qnEzd9nhUv5d61yZN8vCuEjhTYxzcWoSpkZVW1lmiq6r5pPI_3xn3yVtzfRxEo-iYRRQo0d_B1uJDzuPcxw-kh6DazjVQn-42PQFOgRfp8_6Q8bCusqwanEsbd8tFs3hNsbP/s320/Overcome.png" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">In the survey, I
had also asked what helped people tame depression. Here are some of the
responses:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l3 level1 lfo3; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><i> 1.</i> </span></span></span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Life, or time:</b> </span></i><span lang="EN-US">While we all face
our share of insecurities and vulnerabilities during teenage or early 20s, with
time we become more adept at handling them, and more comfortable in our own
skin. So, if identity crisis is what you are facing, just hang in there, my
friend, for things do get better.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l3 level1 lfo3; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 2.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Acceptance:</b> </span></i><span lang="EN-US">The first step to
solving a problem is acknowledging there is one. It is a difficult task, for people
generally dismiss depression as boredom, or laziness. But constant feelings of
dejection could also be clinical depression, and recognizing that the feeling
is persisting for a long time is vital. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l3 level1 lfo3; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 3.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Medication/Therapy:</b>
</span></i><span lang="EN-US">The
testimonials I received in my survey emphasized greatly the importance of talking
to a counsellor. And it makes sense, right, having an impartial person, with no
personal role in your situation, listen to your problems and help you solve it?
Even if one is not clinically depressed, it is worth talking to a professional
about what is bothering you.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l3 level1 lfo3; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 4.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Friends &
Family: </b></span></i><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><b> </b></span>We tend to underestimate how
much our friends and family care for us, especially when we are trying to deal with
our insecurities. The truth is, all of us are involved in our own personal
struggle, and often fail to recognize what our near ones are going
through. If you are feeling depressed, as much as it angers you to be the one
who approaches, you have to sit your people down and tell them what you are
feeling. Your friends and family may really surprise you.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l3 level1 lfo3; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 5.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><b>Self-work:</b> </span></i><span lang="EN-US">Unfortunately, most
of the fight is to be fought alone, and needs working on yourself, and your
self-esteem. A lot of respondents talked about taking up a new job, or moving
to a new place, or taking up a new challenge – basically moving out of the
comfort zone. They also talked about watching or reading inspirational content,
and working on that one thing that makes you feel accomplished. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">What could be done?<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;">So what could one
do to help a friend in need, or just the cause of mental health awareness? The
survey asked the same question, and here are some suggestions:</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxCUsUwY6BtMjhURNrCIBwMy1hElqw2qUvK6v_zr4TgT0MR1-x5UY_8Tn7mZQNMQfqGysnocFXweb5s3wHZQhr5xqwJzf8epYG5ZnPKTy6XWxI80QY3z1tkLSTzyKZUr2UzOmYukzqYpJ4/s1600/Depression.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxCUsUwY6BtMjhURNrCIBwMy1hElqw2qUvK6v_zr4TgT0MR1-x5UY_8Tn7mZQNMQfqGysnocFXweb5s3wHZQhr5xqwJzf8epYG5ZnPKTy6XWxI80QY3z1tkLSTzyKZUr2UzOmYukzqYpJ4/s320/Depression.jpeg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 1.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Be nice, and don’t judge.
</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US">As
someone who has judged others, and been judged myself, I can say with
conviction that the entire process adds no value - zilch, nada. And while one
is often tempted to judge others, it is worthwhile to take at least a moment to empathize with them, for everyone is fighting their own battle. And maybe if
we knew of their problems, we would gladly accept ours and cherish them.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 2.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Do not gaslight.</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US"> Putting someone
down to feel better about oneself is the way most of us deal with our own
insecurities, but it can end up hurting someone far deeper than we thought it
would.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 3.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Help your friends
or family find things that they love</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US">, or that make them happy –
hobbies, passions or a change in scenery. A friend once confessed that the only
reason she didn’t consider suicide when she was depressed was because the 7<sup>th</sup>
part of Harry Potter hadn’t come out yet, and she wanted to read it before she
died. While this is a slightly frightening example, it still shows that life is
in the simpler things, which sometimes is all you need to deal with the bigger
challenges.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 4.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Listen to them.</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US"> Don’t preach. Don’t
console. Don’t pity. Share your own experiences, if any, but with an intent to
help and not brag. A person who talks to you about their depression is putting
all their vulnerabilities in front of you, and it’s essential to respect that.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 5.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Encourage them to
see a psychologist</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US">, without any stigma. Sometimes, it helps to have a
third-party listen to your problem without any vested interest. A lot of the
correspondents recommended this, and there is no reason why you shouldn’t recommend
it to your friend – you want to see them happy after all.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 6.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Stay loyal to them.</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US"> There goes a
saying that a person is the sum of the five people they spend the most time
with. But in practicing that, we tend to ignore friends who have now become
pessimistic, or cynical or anxious without understanding the reason why. It
just may be that these are the people who need your help, and who hang out with
you because YOU bring positive energy. Life is full of ups and downs, and
sometimes, it is as important to embrace negativity, as it is to be optimistic.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 7.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US">Raise awareness</span></i></b><span lang="EN-US">. There is a lack
of infrastructure to tackle mental health issues in India. Neither are we
taught how to deal with such issues at school, nor are there enough specialty
clinics with professional psychologists to help the depressed. When you are
depressed, you are deeply concerned about privacy and anonymity, and there aren’t
many channels that offer this. So it is up to us to talk about the need for
such platforms, contribute to making them happen. There are companies that
offer counselling to employees of different firms that are in contract with
them – try to get your firm associated with them. If you are a parent, demand that the school organize sessions by experts to help your children understand and
tackle these pressures. And speak up to remove the taboo around seeing a
therapist.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms", sans-serif;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> <i style="font-weight: bold;">8.</i><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></span></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Change the
narrative. </span></i></b></span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Let’s start to redefine what success and failure are, reimagine who is
desirable and who is not. Let’s re-evaluate the ideal that we are striving
towards, that makes so many of us feel inadequate or incompetent. And let’s
learnt to accept our differences. If nothing else, always be willing to share
your chocolate – it may ward off somebody else’s dementors, well, at least temporarily. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo4; text-align: justify; text-indent: -18.0pt; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJJ5pE8L_M3tE0UZKI6PadGNQx2RjjBGs0cm6Uouo7oXMsqzfz49q4sD0k6ItmqNKWr9UrwA9We4dMfz68WdPbh4YajwUxAR5xzYZHcET4_eH3iBDEG6zWj0_LGF-ACPUChWA7vVI59vCR/s1600/chocolate-can-only-be-a-short-term-remedy-however-finding-ways-8684692.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJJ5pE8L_M3tE0UZKI6PadGNQx2RjjBGs0cm6Uouo7oXMsqzfz49q4sD0k6ItmqNKWr9UrwA9We4dMfz68WdPbh4YajwUxAR5xzYZHcET4_eH3iBDEG6zWj0_LGF-ACPUChWA7vVI59vCR/s320/chocolate-can-only-be-a-short-term-remedy-however-finding-ways-8684692.png" width="281" /></a></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-52006820829929757422017-01-29T11:38:00.000-08:002017-01-29T11:38:03.921-08:00From Consumption to Contribution<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br />
2016 brought with it a lot of things that blew our minds - Brexit, US
Presidential Elections and demonetization. The year of universal disappointment
finally gave way to 2017, which in its first month itself has given people a
lot to talk about, such as the inauguration of the 45th US President amid
worldwide protests by women, and closer home, the debate surrounding
Jallikattu. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 11.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">Personally,
2017 seems to be the year when I will finally execute the plans I had made for
myself in 2016 (it was the year of disappointment for me too). I finally have a
stamped passport, having visited Singapore in the first week of January (No, it
wasn't a professional trip, and yes, I had a lot of fun). Keeping alive the
trend of being late, I sat down this weekend to reflect on the year gone by,
just as people started breaking their resolutions for this year.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 11.0pt;"> </span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">The one theme
that seemed to emerge from my introspection was that of consumption, not just food
or expenditure - though that consumption is more conspicuous, what with XL
clothes and XXL credit card bills – but of content and information. I realized
that I had taken in a lot of information this year, through different media.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7hRcJTXeE02fak_hx2kwf4HD6FOwtPa6K4jzoisEUM4Zbs2Qmnc32vugsPegQnGE1VeU1SZ1ycWCG9GTudkLKrbnRS7KZoh2BlDRqcrj9zI9rVmWkuNZB3B96Q71cig_CMVzepDwU2iho/s1600/landscape-1479804519-picmonkdey-collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7hRcJTXeE02fak_hx2kwf4HD6FOwtPa6K4jzoisEUM4Zbs2Qmnc32vugsPegQnGE1VeU1SZ1ycWCG9GTudkLKrbnRS7KZoh2BlDRqcrj9zI9rVmWkuNZB3B96Q71cig_CMVzepDwU2iho/s320/landscape-1479804519-picmonkdey-collage.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">The rise of web series in India was one of the best things that
happened in 2016. Whether it was TVF’s Tripling and Humorously Yours, with
great production value and greater popularity, or lesser known ones like Aam
Aadmi Family and Little Things, there was a wide variety of themes that were
explored this year. With mostly crisp content, and some fresh talent, web
series have great potential, and deserve to be covered in depth (note to self).
It was also heartening to see polished TV and movie actors like Lubna Salim,
Shernaz Patel, Kumud Mishra and Rajesh Sharma join the web-series bandwagon and
take on relatable characters.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">Short Films were the next best thing after web series. Movies like
Kriti, Pure Veg and Chutney had some of our favourite actors play interesting
characters. In fact, such was the traction of short films that YFilms, the
digital sibling of YRF, came up with a weekly series of romantic short films called
Love Shots, and Filmfare added an award category for such films. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">But my consumption of content was not limited to entertaining
videos. I devoured articles published on Storypick (don’t judge, we all do so),
Inc.com or Scroll, which has turned out to be quite a website. While digital
content formed the major source of information for me, I did not spare printed
content either. I managed to maintain long streaks of reading the newspaper,
and yes, it was not just to show off. I now have favourite columnists, and
specific sections in the newspaper that I look forward to. I also managed to
tick off some books from my To-Read List – Tipping point, My Gita by Devdutt
Pattnaik, Love in the Time of Cholera.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">Which brings me to the second part of my introspection – what did
I do with this information? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">With almost every content provider, print or otherwise, having an
app of its own, there’s easy access to all sorts of information. According to a
study, smartphone users spend 2.2+ hours everyday with their devices – reading
articles or watching videos. We are almost always looking at our smartphone,
whether it’s in a queue or in the bus, and for some, even the bathroom. But if
we do not add to the discussion, or take that information to improve something
in our lives, are we not becoming some sort of parasite?</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">I wondered what I did with the immense information and content I
exposed myself to – Did I share it with people? Did I upgrade myself? Did I
contribute to the discussion? Did I apply the learning in my life? The answer
was largely a no. While I did spend hours watching YouTube channels featuring fancy
recipes, why did I stick to perfecting the art of making Maggi? Did I write to
my favourite newspaper columnists? Did I apply the learnings from Gita in my
everyday life? And I ask the same question to my friends through this blog. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">Even better
than incorporating something in one’s own life is sharing what one knows with
others. While there are multiple ways of getting information, the beauty of the
internet lies in the fact that there are equal opportunities to contribute. However,
there’s a thing in internet culture called the 1% rule, which states that only
1% of the users of a website actively create new content, while the other 99%
of the participants only lurk. This is also called participation
inequality. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3ZE66SM1gwossGnDU0xISTsmXmyF79siA7OZ9etnCCCFlDMsEFfmYxOkHYOJPC5lKC220_ZmsT6A9CdR5YwmEh0lw4N0djY1NrFVcdbxTusjK7rYneS0YmHbJj-OxtfYGQJiXyT3ZjJF_/s1600/marketing-png-online-marketing-1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="274" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3ZE66SM1gwossGnDU0xISTsmXmyF79siA7OZ9etnCCCFlDMsEFfmYxOkHYOJPC5lKC220_ZmsT6A9CdR5YwmEh0lw4N0djY1NrFVcdbxTusjK7rYneS0YmHbJj-OxtfYGQJiXyT3ZjJF_/s320/marketing-png-online-marketing-1.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">Participation
inequality, in my humble opinion, hurts the collaborative value of social media
and internet. It is a bit like elections – if people with a particular ideology
don’t go out to vote, that ideology is under-represented. Similarly, if people
do not share their experiences frequently enough, it will be much harder to
find what people like us think of a product or an experience. As much as we use
this data to make our own decisions, we can also provide such data to others,
hence giving back. Another aspect of this is in driving online discussions –
until and unless sensible people share logical ideas, and persist to keep a
discussion relevant to the topic, trolls will continue to rule and influence.
And that is one problem we definitely need to address. Being a lurker is easy,
but being a participant is not necessarily difficult.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">It could be as simple as writing a Zomato review, or if you are a
subject matter expert, helping people out on Quora or LinkedIn. I have a
friend, who seems to watch a new movie everyday – but he makes it a point to
write an extensive review of the movie, with insights on everything from the
storytelling to cinematography. Another friend of mine reads a lot, and she
always posts a review of the book on Goodreads and Facebook – it is an optional
feature, but that she takes the time to give value back is admirable.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Helvetica Neue"; font-size: 11.0pt;">There’s going
to be a tsunami of content and information in 2017, and yes, we are going to be
completely immersed in it. But how we use this information, could distinguish
this year from the despicable year 2016 was. This year, let’s become a
contributor, and not just a consumer. I just made a small attempt at doing so: <a href="http://zoma.to/review/29349061" target="_blank">http://zoma.to/review/29349061</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-45249049308427560472016-08-06T16:29:00.001-07:002016-08-06T16:36:39.304-07:00Let There Be "Lite"<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">I am amazed, as well as embarrassed, that it has been almost a year since I last wrote a post for this blog. There are reasons aplenty for this inactivity - a spurt in weekend activities that go beyond watching Karan Johar movie marathons, a new outlet for creative expression where the audience can not hit the close button (read Toastmasters), increasing work pressures (as an IT professional, it is my duty to blame work for everything), quarter-life cynicism towards most issues, the fear of an over-sensitive social media population, and some good old procrastination. What has spurred me into action though, is the place that taught me the art of taking lite, something I have evidently applied with this blog.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKWSzEvYD7k25pV-qwWwSo-CVee-6q-n3oevxJesNDWp9FmcdYRrRrYer8T25iwB70muhESn0jvzOO236K0dly5pmA2bu-A7uJMfyUrtwevW9-TK2FWvWYTDo9y9JzE8FkFgPOX7d2eMDh/s1600/lite.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><img border="0" height="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKWSzEvYD7k25pV-qwWwSo-CVee-6q-n3oevxJesNDWp9FmcdYRrRrYer8T25iwB70muhESn0jvzOO236K0dly5pmA2bu-A7uJMfyUrtwevW9-TK2FWvWYTDo9y9JzE8FkFgPOX7d2eMDh/s400/lite.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">On 5th August 2016, thousands of people around the world woke up with a rush of nostalgia, and the mission to splash it all over social media. In a fairly recent and unique tradition, students and alumni of BITS-Pilani celebrate their alma mater on the first Friday of August by posting snapshots and snippets of their college memories on social media, donning the once-oversized-now-taut BITSian T-shirts to office, and meeting up with other alumni in the city, much to the amusement and slight annoyance of new friends, bosses, spouses and children. </span></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">If you think about it, college life is the most special period for almost everyone, BITSian or otherwise. It was the time when they felt most lively, loved most passionately, had most fun and were their fittest. Each college has its own lingo, its own legends. And almost everyone, BITSian or otherwise, has faced the impact of distance on friendships that were to be forever. And for a split second everyday, we all wish to relive those days again.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtwbLFA0MJW8CXhdZt-nKFVDYM7uxbxqE4g_H7TE3zp1P6x6CuX5DES3YACl7ntMuJIPYGxegP8OTiwi0-4ZumOH4pXtV-lVqnEhUY3bnPkFSLWybE0yZbtKCsoCUWgXHDIHnMIi-wbvCu/s1600/bits01_may312k4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><img border="0" height="249" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtwbLFA0MJW8CXhdZt-nKFVDYM7uxbxqE4g_H7TE3zp1P6x6CuX5DES3YACl7ntMuJIPYGxegP8OTiwi0-4ZumOH4pXtV-lVqnEhUY3bnPkFSLWybE0yZbtKCsoCUWgXHDIHnMIi-wbvCu/s400/bits01_may312k4.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">But the success of BITSians Day lies in its concerted execution, thanks to the alumni cell BITSAA. There is something heartwarming about generations of BITS-Pilani products sharing stories from what might be the defining era of their lives. And nothing can beat the pride of seeing just how widely we are spread, and how many companies we drive, as pictures of BITSians posing next to the logos of their current institutions come up on Facebook. It is also fun to find out where your senior has landed up, which batchmate started his own company, which junior has taken an unconventional path, which BITSian couple actually got together. Even if they are not attending open-for-all get-togethers, people make it a point to meet or Skype with their friends, to relive and retell their experiences and misadventures. This event provides an annual update on the people who saw you grow, ensuring that the promise to stay connected is fulfilled, despite the distances.</span></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">I remember my first BITSians Day two years ago - fresh out of college, I was happy to find so many BITSians in my city, but was very casual about it. Cut to the next year, I was spamming social media crazily, having realised that the fanciness of corporate life is no match for the simple joys I experienced in the quaint and isolated town called Pilani, and that it is much harder to find people with your own wavelength. It wasn't as frenzied a celebration this year, and I believe that with each passing year, BITSians' Day will be less about being vocal, and more about revisiting the innocence and marvelling at our familiarity with BITSians we don't know - something I experienced when calls for a selfie were replaced with calls for DoPY. It will be about being nostalgic, and being introspective of how BITS has affected us.</span></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">At times when I, like apparently everyone else, face bouts of quarter-life crisis, I tend to wonder if my choices turned out well. The one thing that I never wonder about, is going to BITS-Pilani. And that's the crux of BITSians' Day.</span></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">Signing off,</span></div>
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;">2009B1A4820P, forever.</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-68883535491627570672015-09-16T22:34:00.004-07:002015-09-16T22:35:08.560-07:00That 90's Show<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Back when I still hadn't touched double digits, in the midst of
summer vacations, Dad would ask during breakfast, "What are your plans for
the day?" (He still does that when I go back home, if I manage to wake up
in time for breakfast). Those were the days when there was no
Facebook to while your time away, or Buzzfeed to tell you the ten most
awesome anything - you had to keep yourself busy. If we didn't have
something constructive to do that day, Dad would give us a small assignment of sorts
- to either write an essay on that trip we just had, or review a book that we
read during the summer, or maybe translate a story in another language. I miss
those days, when my parents would ask me about that article that I had started,
and I couldn't justify its incomplete state using the excuses of
"work" or "lack of inspiration". In such a scenario, there
won't have been a hiatus of four months between two blog posts of mine, but
then I am "grown up" now, and only existential crisis can force me
into action.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">What prompted me to write again was something that happened today.
I am sitting in a cab, cursing at the traffic, feeling guilty for running late
yet again, getting annoyed at the radio advertisements, when suddenly the song
"<i>Dard Karara</i>" is played on the radio, and now I am smiling,
and nodding my head rhythmically. In a different version of the same incident,
I was looking at my code in frustration, when "<i>ye raat aur ye doori</i>"
came up on my playlist, and I started shrugging my shoulders like Aamir Khan from
Andaz Apna Apna. These 90's songs seem to work like a switch, and it made me
wonder why.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge fan of songs from that
era, and I am not alone. The songs from the Bollywood of the 90s are usually
not very deep in meaning, have a tune that is typically desi, and have low
production value. Yet there are so many like me, for whom the first rain song
that comes to mind is "<i>Tip tip barsa pani</i>", who know the
complete lyrics of "<i>Tan tana tan, tan tan tara</i>" and who dance
with such joy on "<i>One two ka four</i>" that no "<i>Bang bang</i>"
could muster. They are the ones who remember more cheeky songs of Govinda than
names of rock bands, and who can watch videos of Madhuri Dixit for hours.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Of course, there are some who judge the likes of us for this
affinity to 90s music. There are three categories of such people. One includes
people who pretend to be cool, but in their hearts, they are like us. I
remember an incident where six of us, of different levels of coolness, were
traveling in a cab. As is the unspoken rule for all cabs in India, only 90s
music was being played in it. We were all cribbing about the quality of the
songs when a more popular number came up. Two lines into the song, almost every
one of us was humming the song or mouthing the words. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Then there is the group of people who will question one’s taste in
music. It is difficult to make them understand that one’s love for the 90s
music and appreciation for Pink Floyd/Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan are not mutually
exclusive. And that we understand the depth in Gulzar's songs as much as we
love the lyrics of “<i>Main to raste se ja
raha tha”</i>. As an article I read had rightly pointed out, people who rejoice
at such songs do so for the humor, improbability and nostalgia associated with
them, and not for the songs themselves. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">And then there is the kind who will not roll their eyes when you
sing those songs or think that you are intellectually challenged, but would urge
you to explore better music. They don’t like the 90s music, period, and that’s
a reasonable position to take.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">So why do people like such songs despite knowing that the songs
are not high on quality? I can’t say for others, but at least for the
generation born in the 90s, the fondness for such music stems from it being a
big part of our childhood. Most of my peers were born in the 90s, and probably
the first song they ever sang was an Anu Malik number. I still have relatives
who remember me by my lisping rendition of “<i>Ye
kaali kaali aankhein</i>”, and I am sure it would be true for most of my
friends.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">It was also the age of innocence. Little did we know that “<i>Sarkay lo khatiya</i>” and “<i>Dhak dhak karne laga</i>” and “<i>Husn hai suhana</i>” and “<i>Hothon pe bas tera naam hai</i>” were supposed
to be erotic songs. For us, they were just dance numbers or romantic songs, but
watching or listening to them now opens one’s eyes to the actual context and
intention behind the songs. We started liking these songs even before we could
critique the taste in which they were directed, or before we could identify
sexism in them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">The actors of that era also played a major role in driving our
attention to those songs. Irrespective of the plot of the movie to which the
song belonged, it always highlighted the idiosyncrasies of the stars involved.
Whether it is Govinda’s fashion sense in “<i>Tu
mera hero no.1” </i>or Madhuri’s moves in “<i>Ankhiyan
milaun</i>”, Salman’s shirtless avtar in “<i>O
o jaane jana”</i> or Juhi’s childlike charm in “<i>Yun hi kat jaega safar</i>”<i>, </i>Akshay
Kumar’s lover boy in “<i>Chura ke dil mera</i>”
or Shah Rukh’s dimpled smile from <i>“Badi
mushkil hai, khoya mera dil hai</i>”, the way these songs were directed played
on the strengths and the USPs of these actors, and contributed significantly in
making them the icons they are now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">The game of Antakshari always takes you back to the 90s or
earlier. Mostly, because it is too damn difficult to remember the lyrics of
songs these days. Have you ever heard an antakshari game start with “</span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Munni badnaam hui</i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">” instead of “</span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">mayi ni mayi</i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">” or “</span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">mere khwaabon mein jo aaye</i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">”? The songs were simple enough to
remember and short enough to continue the game forward. Imagine singing “</span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Badtameez dil..</i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">”. It would go “</span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Naak mein nageena dekha, paan ka pudina
dekha,… abba dabba chabba</i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">” (see what I did there?). I don’t remember having
to look up the lyrics of the songs from that era, but now I have to, because I
don’t understand why people are praising </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Banno’s
sweater</i><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">. It’s “swagger”, what used to be “jalwa”.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">That being said, the 90s gave us some beautiful songs too, besides
the <i>aflatoon</i> ones. “<i>Arey re arey ye kya hua”, “Aankhon ki
gustakhiyan”, “Chhoti si asha”, “Dhol bajne laga”, “Chura lo na dil mera”, “Tanha
tanha yahaan pe jeena”, “Sandese aate hain”, “Urvashi urvashi”, “Jo haal dil
ka, idhar ho raha hai”</i> all belong to the same period as “<i>Unchi hai building</i>”. We also have some
classy item songs from the time. While “<i>Saat
samundar paar”</i> is what people remember, “<i>Tu cheez badi hai mast mast</i>” and “<i>Chhaiyaan chhaiyaan</i>” are also from the same period, and no “<i>Baby ka birthday bash</i>” can inspire the
same zeal and fervor.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">So Honey Singh can remake “<i>Dheere
dheere</i>” or John Abraham can have a sexed up version of <i>“Na jaane kahaan se aayi hai</i>”, but they won’t find a place in my
playlist unless they have the same earnestness or innocent naughtiness that was
typical of the 90s, the era I grew up in. It was an era when we, like the
music, were not judged or questioned, and while we are happy to have moved on
from the period, it’s memories continue to rejuvenate us time and again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-39687848218522405692015-05-12T08:50:00.001-07:002015-05-12T08:50:37.867-07:00The Good, The Bad and The Choice<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I
often wonder what it would feel like to be a celebrity - to know that any
act, small or big, in your personal life can spark debates on TV channels and
hashtags on social media, to know that there are millions of people who try to
emulate you, and who are willing to lay down their life for you. What actually
makes it overwhelming is the fact that these millions don't know you
personally, and you haven't met, heard or seen anyone of them (at lease
consciously). It is power of its own kind, and I can imagine it is easy to be
drunk with this power. Today's blog is about one such celebrity, who hogged the
limelight and headlines last week. Pretty obvious, the Bhai of Bollywood.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Let
me clarify at the outset that this blog is not a reaction to Bombay High
Court's suspension of Salman's sentence in the Hit-and-Run case, and neither is
this a character assassination of Salman Khan. A lot has already been written
and I really don't care if he is an angel from heaven or devil incarnate, he
still makes terrible movies. This blog is slightly inspired by the plethora of
reactions generated by<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">#SalmanVerdict</span></b><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">and the utter pointlessness of them.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">First
off, my response to his ardent fans : Refer to my first paragraph, and realize
that since you don't know him personally, any attempt to defend him, that is
not supported by hard facts, is illogical. Sure, he might be big on charities,
but you really don't know where the proceeds for that charity come from. And if
he is so generous of heart, he doesn't need to publicize it (remember the
saying : Neki kar dariya mein daal). And true, the story of how he adopted a
young girl from the streets and raised her well and gave her a big bang wedding
is moving, it still doesn't compensate for taking somebody else's life due to
sheer irresponsibility. Oh, and for those who say that him entertaining and
inspiring so many people with his films is charity in itself (yes, this
argument was made - I am glad we don't have a jury system), it would have made
sense if he hadn't been paid for it. And the "Tere Naam" hairstyle is
probably the worst thing he ever inflicted on the masses, in my humble opinion.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Now,
my take on the reactions from his Bollywood buddies: I kind of get it, you
know. Think about it yourself, you know someone, you work with them, share a
good rapport with them, and then they get caught for doing something illegal,
you don't start hating them altogether, and don't rejoice at them being caught,
at least not openly. You either stand by them, or reserve your comments (a
luxury most Bolly celebs don't avail). It's just human nature. And let's not
forget that Salman is one of the most powerful people in Bollywood. A lot of
the young actors who supported him on social media owe their filmy career to
him. He has been responsible for the careers of a certain Superman, a certain
Fukra, a certain Shona, and also the career (or lack thereof) of a certain
ex-boyfriend of a certain ex-girlfriend. So they are not going to point a
finger at him. Probably the only young celeb who kind of hinted that he may
have been in the wrong, is the daughter of a Bollywood veteran known to speak
his mind, and so she has strong backing of her own and can say it. We'll see
what she says if a celebrated director-cum-showhost gets in trouble. The
reactions of these celebs are results of the relationships in Bollywood, and
one can't really judge them.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The
reactions that you CAN judge, are by a popular singer and a socialite. They
suggested that the poor people who got harmed by Salman's car should not have
slept on the footpath. And this is the point where the actual issue at hand
comes up: CHOICE. Those people injured and killed by Salman's car did not have
any other choice but sleep at the footpath. Had they had one, I am pretty sure
they won't have slept there. Salman, on the other hand, had the choice to 1.
Not drive when he is that drunk, 2. Not run away from his blunder.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">You
see, this case is not about whether Salman is a good guy or a bad guy. The case
is about the choices he made, and their consequences - for the poor chap who
died on the street under his car, and for the rich spoiled brat who was driving
it. This case is about driving under influence, and hitting and running. A wealthy
man like himself could have called a driver (it may not have been as thrilling
as driving when you have the rush of alcohol, but it won't have cost someone
their life). Even if he did what the Court says he did, he could have taken
that man to the hospital, or at least not let his poor driver take the blame
some thirteen years later. Life would have been easier for him that way, not
that it is too difficult now. Sure, Salman must have transformed from the
drunk, animal hunting, girlfriend beating brat he allegedly was, to a man with
the heart of gold - but the choices he made stick, with him and with the people
he hurt. And everyone should face the music. Whether or not the system delivers
is a different story altogether. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">My
last word is to all those responsible citizens of the country who rejoiced when
he was convicted and were appalled when he got the bail: Don't make the same
mistakes he made. Otherwise you lose the right to self-righteousness. Next time
you go to a pub, and have had a little too much to drink, make the right choice
and call a cab. Don't drink and drive. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-5010808243801260542015-04-21T13:52:00.000-07:002015-04-21T13:52:35.984-07:00Plan. Procrastinate. Sleep. Repeat. (Not.)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">After what I call a mild success of this blog last year (read as a decent number of likes for my posts), I set a resolution for myself - to publish at least twenty-four posts this year, ideally two per month. It was a SMART (specific, measured, achievable, relevant and timed) goal, yet as you can clearly see from the archive at the right hand side of this page, I am not even close to my target. For a good month and a half, I attributed this failing streak to having a writer's block. After all, how can I write about just any random thing? Isn't there something called inspiration? On closer inspection, though, I realized that the root cause was procrastination. (I just realized how much of my vocabulary has become corporate style.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It wasn't that I didn't have topics to write on. In fact, for some of them, I had even thought of openings and closings. But by the time I would get around to actually writing the blog, the issue would become stale. It's not like I didn't try. I carved out a big chunk of time on the weekends for blogging, but then "how was I supposed to know that I'd be sleeping all day long after the "impromptu" party I had the night before, or that it would take that long to find the dress that I was looking for. And to be fair, my goal was 24 posts this year, no matter what intervals they come in." Of course, all these excuses reeked of a bigger problem called procrastination. It wasn't just blogging that was a victim of this inertia to do things. There was exercise, keeping track of my expenses, reading a book. Basically, every resolution I made this year.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As I thought more about it, I noticed that planning and procrastinating form a very tricky and vicious cycle. Take for example my previous post. I had planned to finally publish a post by the date I actually published it on. Having already dilly-dallyed doing so for a month, I was determined to write at least something by the target date, and so I stayed up late to finish the task. This basically meant that I wasn't able to wake up early enough for my morning jog, which was also a big part of my resolutions. If I did so, I would have been tired all day long the next day, making multiple visits to the coffee machine. Of course, I wouldn't have been able to complete my work goals, and would have had to work over-time. Which meant that I would have gotten back late from office and either done half-asleep what I had perhaps too ambitiously planned for the next day (and repeat the cycle), or slept on it and not done it (which is what happened).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">One would say that I could have planned more properly. But keeping fewer tasks per week had a greater chance, and supporting data from the past, of not getting anything done at all. All this contemplation was just about to put me in panic mode when I decided to check if something similar was happening to my friends.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Thankfully, almost all of them were going through another version of the same problem. Impromptu dinners, production issues, distance of gym from home were other contributing factors for their inertia. So I decided to find out a solution to this problem, with the help of, you guessed it, Google Baba. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The wiki-how page instructed to make lists of tasks to be done, and breaking it into smaller pieces of work, and then doing them. Which basically means doing more work to get your task done. In all my struggle as a procrastinator, I have found lists and plans and sub-task division as one of the best ways of actually procrastinating. Some other page advised one to just not procrastinate. Really? The fact that I reached the page means that I know I don't have to. It is like telling an furious person to not be angry. The person is surely not in the frame of mind to make that decision instantly, they have to be taken through small gestures to that state. So, is there no solution to getting around it?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Fortunately, there is. And one that I have tried myself. It is called <a href="http://www.structuredprocrastination.com/" target="_blank">structured procrastination</a>. It basically goes like this: You know you will buy that book you had an eye on instead of booking your flight tickets till the fares really really shoot up. You also know that you will end up at McDonalds meeting an old friend even though you were going only for grocery shopping. So why not add them to your list of To-Do items? Just make a list of all important stuff that you have to do along with stuff that you will do to avoid doing the important stuff. And then cross them off when you do them. Soon you will be left with only the important, and now urgent, things to do, and you will do them because that's how procrastinators work. In my experience, it has proved to be easier than it sounds. It also drives up satisfaction levels. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It is essentially a win-win situation, wherein you put off doing something but still end up doing a lot of useful things. So embrace the procrastinator in you, and maybe trick them a little. And I'll be doing the same. From tomorrow.</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-56391496201887297032015-03-08T14:20:00.001-07:002015-03-08T14:20:15.393-07:008 Concepts of Everyday Sexism<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The past week was that time of the year when five-star hotels and conference centers were booked by corporate houses and government organizations all over the world to hold award ceremonies, panel discussions, speaker series and networking luncheons to mark International Women's Day. Women all over shared their stories of success and failures, stories of their growth as well as hardships. They participated in fun activities, games and mentoring sessions, while some of their male colleagues cribbed about how they were not entitled to the lavish lunch.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Being a woman is both unnerving and fun. Everyone knows why it can be distressing at times. There is nature's gift of a taxing physiology, there is the patriarchal nature of society. There are the various forms of violence that men have tried to inflict upon us, and the constant lurking fear that we could be the next victim. There are also societal expectations women are supposed to fulfill failing which they may be called names. And of course, in many places, unequal returns for equal work. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That being said, there are many aspects of being a woman that most women love. Women, in general, are more expressive and they really value this quality. Unlike men, they usually are constantly thinking about something or the other, and while it may sometimes lead to disastrous consequences, they love to observe their train of thoughts. Their instinctive and expressive nature allows them to connect more deeply with both men and women. Plus, they can nag you and get away with it. Also, a much wider range of clothes and accessories to choose from.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As the celebrations of Women's Day recede, I would like to share the 8 things I wish happen to reduce sexism. Of course, it goes without saying that I want women to be treated with respect and dignity, that there is a shift in mentality for the society, that there is a stop to sexual exploitation and acid attacks, that marital rapes get included in the list of sex crimes, and that my parents aren't faced with sleepless nights if I stay out till late or am traveling. The things I want are much simpler to achieve, they make sense for both men and women, and you and I can make them happen.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">How can a fairness cream make you realize that you need to get a perfect job and your own house to marry a well-settled guy? Yes, I am talking about our country's crazy obsession with skin tone. It is surprising that over all these years, the number of brands that bring out fairness creams for women, and fairly recently (see what I did there) also for men, has just increased. Sure, confidence and presentability matter when it comes to a job interview or a prospective spouse, but what value does being <i>gora </i>add? As one ad featuring Arjun Rampal goes, we are people, not walls that we carry a shade card with us.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Speaking of colors, it intrigues me as to what led to the notion that PINK is a woman's color. Why is it that all girls and women are somehow expected to like pink? Consider how many of the images in an <a href="https://www.google.co.in/search?q=women%27s+day&es_sm=93&biw=1366&bih=667&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=i7f8VNm0KZSVuASCh4Bg&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ" target="_blank">image search</a> for Women's Day have a pink theme! And to think of it, this convention hurts men more than it affects women. Why is it that there is an inherent shock value when a guy wears pink? I know a couple of guys who carry it off better than I do, so why should the color be restricted to one specific gender? Some men deliberately avoid buying things in pink, even inconsequential objects like a toothbrush or a stapler. And let us admit it, at some point or the other, all of us have mocked a friend for using a pink object. It makes no sense that a particular gender claims a color for itself. Let us try to remember that <b><i>a</i></b><i style="font-weight: bold;">ll colors are for everyone</i>, and keep that in mind in our conversations.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A subplot in a recent movie showed an activist asking a man to officially forgive the murderer of his wife and child. I k</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">now many such mercy </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">appeals take place daily. Another video, which went viral last week, gave a remorseless convict for a horrific rape a platform to air his views on women, and justification for his acts. I also read an article which attempted to garner sympathy for a rapist by highlighting the poverty in which he was brought up. The misery of this man was given more attention than the misery of the woman he raped. I do believe that all criminals have a right to a good defense, a fair trial, and in cases of a death sentence, a proper protocol to be followed for execution and not vigilante justice, like the one that happened recently. I also agree that we need to acknowledge and do something about the conditions in which such criminals breed. And by all means, our activists should support their families though this, so that another criminal is not made. But that is where it should stop. There is much talk about the rights of these murderers, terrorists and rapists, but what about the rights of those people who were minding their own business, for whom it was just another day when their lives turned course, whose families were destroyed by these very perpetrators? Such felons, who ditched their last shred of humanity when committing those acts, deserve neither our sympathy, nor media attention. A society's attitude towards rapists and murderers can also act as a deterrent, and we need to be firm about it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: #cc0000;">4. Educate Them All</span></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The one thing that India needs more than anything else is sex education. Contrary to what many people believe, it would act more as a damper to promiscuity than as a promoter of it. Fewer people would want to indulge in something that could lead to a distressing pregnancy or a life-threatening infectious disease. And even if they want to, at least they would do it right. The benefits of sex education are much greater, though. It also entails understanding one's own anatomy, and that of the opposite sex, I can't stress enough on everyone knowing about menstruation. All of this would lead to a better understanding of the opposite gender. It would also help eliminate the taboo associated with menstruation and infertility, and also help family planning initiatives. A proper education is a much better alternative for the society as compared to people learning about it from porn and internet websites.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As much as it doesn't make sense to the miser in me, the feminist in me thinks that </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Ladies' Nights </i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">are one of the more sexist things that we have come up with. So is the concept of free and unrestricted entry to girls and exorbitant rates for guys in a lot of pubs. Free booze or entry for girls means more girls will come to your pub and drink a lot more than usual, and more guys will follow them, without hesitating to pay. Of course, I do like it when I don't have to shell out 2 grands to have a fun night. And to be fair, it is just a well-thought out and successful marketing ploy that exploits natural human behavior that stems from an evolutionary principle. But there is a very strong hint of objectification here. Especially when a lot of men who visit a pub on Ladies' Nights make up their own notions of the availability of the females present, or when random guys approach random girls outside such pubs to pair up and avail free couples entry. I can't say if this tradition is harmful, but it definitely is unnecessary. Maybe my argument would make more sense if you think about the concept of a <i>Gentlemen's Night.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I am talking about a land which most men seem to want to avoid. It is the <b>Friend-Zone</b>. From the various definitions I have come across, it seems to be a place guys are in when a girl who is their friend does not see them as anything more than a <b>friend</b>, but they can't help being her <b>friend</b>. Think about it. And someone please tell me, what is wrong with it? Now if you are one of those blokes who are crushing on a girl, who takes advantage of your feelings to make you do things expected from a boyfriend, without reciprocating your actions or your feelings, like what happened to that fellow in <i>Pyaar ka Punchnama, </i>then she probably doesn't see you as a friend at all. If you are one of those who have been rejected by a girl, but she is insisting that you don't stop being her friend, and it hurts you being with her but you'll still be her friend, then my friend (see what I did there), it's time to toughen up but stop blaming her. And you definitely can't blame her if she hasn't read your mind and understood any romantic feelings you have for her. But if you're friends with a nice girl who wants to be friends with you, it doesn't seem to be a bad place at all. And if there is no romantic angle involved, then one should be proud to be in the friend-zone. The logic of friend-zone is just very very twisted, and hence the concept should just be done away with.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A major pain point in our country is the lack of toilets in public places and highways. We need to have more toilets built, not just for women but also for men. While it definitely is a hassle for women to exercise control, while urging their drivers to rush, or stop at shady dhabas, seeing men take a leak just about anywhere is a more cringe-worthy thing. Imagine you are walking in bright sunlight and go and stand below a shady tree, only to find out that a man was pissing behind its trunk. While some men do their business unabashedly, without a hint of embarrassment, it always becomes very awkward for women. Maybe it is because the onus of dignity is always placed on the woman in our society, even though in this case, it is the man who is in an undignified position. And more than anything else, it is extremely unhygienic.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My last point is about high-profile and glamorous sexism. Have you ever seen an actor being cast in a movie in a small, meaningless role inconsequential to the storyline, just for being an eye candy? The media industry across the world is often very sexist, inspite of claims of being on a higher moral ground. We are all aware of the controversy about a leading Indian daily focusing on certain aspects of a leading Indian actress. <b><a href="http://www.buzzfeed.com/elliewoodward/im-not-bossy-im-the-boss#.yg23gJNKo" target="_blank">This</a> </b>article shows you just the tip of the iceberg that is the number of sexist questions female celebrities face. And if you thought it was just the glamour industry, you are grossly under-informed, because <b><a href="http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-style/news/amal-robes-2015291" target="_blank">this </a></b>is not what you should be asking a lawyer even if she is married to an actor, and an <b><a href="http://www.dnaindia.com/india/report-najma-heptullah-and-smriti-irani-the-oldest-and-youngest-cabinet-ministers-are-women-1991543" target="_blank">article</a></b> about women representation in the Indian cabinet should not be talking about what they wore to the swearing-in. You'll find many more instances if you look closely. While women can lean in all they could, people need to move out of their old perceptions about successful women. So it would be great if we focus less on how well they twirl on the red carpet and more on how well they do their jobs.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Women issues are a favorite living room topic of discussion nowadays, and lead to raging, yet enlightening debates. But as you can see, women issues are not always women issues. Sexism is everyone's issue!</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-31173638973584327182015-01-26T13:03:00.000-08:002015-01-26T13:04:36.134-08:0020 Thoughts I Had While Watching The Republic Day Parade<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">India celebrated its 66th Republic Day today. 85 years ago this day, a group of people in the British colony of India had proclaimed Purna Swaraj, and almost 20 years from that day, India celebrated the birth of the Constitution, a governing document for Indians, by Indians!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">For the first time in last 20 or so years, I woke up early specially to watch the live telecast of Republic Day Parade, and saw it till the end, instead of just bits and parts. And no, it wasn't because Barack Obama was the Chief Guest or because Narendra Modi was the Prime Minister. It was probably because it was the last day of the long weekend, and so a lazy sleep-in was not really a change of routine. Besides, it was a tradition (I think in all families across India) to cuddle in a cozy razai and watch the proud display of India's military prowess and cultural diversity. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So, sitting alone in my flat, as I watched the Parade, and kinda reminisced about special morning assemblies in school and waking up to Maa Tujhe Salaam blaring from the loudspeakers in hostel, I decided to document all that struck me about this year's Parade.This piece may be a bit long (the parade was long too), but do read it till the end!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">1. The very first thing that I noticed was how long it had been since I had heard pure, and correct, Hindi being spoken, and how beautiful it sounded. The Hindi spoken in movies, or TV (even News channels) is plain and broken, and the one we speak has more English than Hindi. So, the commentary,monotonous as it was, was very much welcome.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">2. As the commentator described the valor of this year's Ashok Chakra awardees, I wondered if I (and other fellow citizens) would remember their names even two hours later. Sure, we get goosebumps and all while listening to Sandese aate hain or Ae mere watan ke logon, but as citizens, we do precious little to honor those who lay down their lives for us. This year, the award was given posthumously to Naik Neeraj Kumar Singh and Major Mukund Vardarajan, who died while battling terrorists in Kashmir. Let us try to remember those names this year.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">3. I was quite delighted by seeing military veterans marching down the Rajpath. These are the people who lived to tell the tales of true heroes, and it was heartening to see them be a part of this prestigious parade.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">4. I literally let out a squeal of cheer when the marching band of Birla Balika Vidyapeeth, Pilani came into picture. For 5 years, my deep winter slumbers in Pilani had been broken by the Republic Day parade rehearsals of the girls in the school adjacent to my hostel. So it was a matter of pride to see these girls march so confidently down the Rajpath. You go, girls, even though you don't let anyone sleep in Meera Bhawan.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">5. When the tableau from Goa came up, I couldn't help but notice how celebratory their music was. It was perhaps the most joyful and chilled out background score in the entire parade. Seriously, if anyone in India knows how to party, it's Goans!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">6. A total of 27 contingents marched in the parade today. These included 9 regiments of the army, contingents from the Air Force, Navy, Paramilitary and other auxiliary civil forces (such as BSF, Coast Guard, CRPF, Railway Police, etc.). Just something to think about.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">7. Did anyone else notice how the camera panned to Uma Bharti when the Madhya Pradesh tableau came up, to Nitin Gadkari when Maharashtra came up or Manohar Parrikar when it was Goa? Though it was cute how they all got up to cheer for their states, I think it is debatable whether to continue to see them as regional leaders when they are supposed to be national leaders. And there is no right answer in this debate. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">8. The Uttarakhand tableau depicted a trip to Kedarnath. It somehow brought up the image of a submerged Kedarnath as a result of floods in 2013. How excessive commercial construction affects the stability of such areas is also a good theme I think.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">9. Did you notice that there was a small marigold garland hanging on every tableau, indicating that some form of Puja must have been done before starting?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">10. Kids among the spectators seemed to be enjoying the parade so much. This is what is great about the Republic Day parade - the camera looks for proud and excited faces, not the prettiest ones.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">11. There is such a multitude of sects and tribes in India, most of which we haven't heard about and frankly, don't even think about. And Indians do wear their hearts on their sleeves (and proudly so). If you think about it, it really is difficult to have a clash-free India. Difficult, but hopefully not impossible.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">12. The second time I cheered was when the UP tableau came up, depicting Nawab Wajid Ali Shah of Awadh. I think I was just pleased about the fact that they showed erstwhile Awadh (present Lucknow). And there were Kathak dancers on the tableau. Apparently Wajid Ali Shah was known for patronizing fine arts. I just found this out. There's so much we don't know.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">13. The Jammu and Kashmir tableau displayed their folk dances, and one of the songs played was "Roshe Valle". I faintly remembered it as the song that Tabu sings in Haider. And this is where you truly realize the impact of Indian cinema. A song may have been sung in a region for years (Sasuraal Genda Phool is another example) but it becomes recognizable only after it features in a Bollywood movie.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">14. The "Make In India" lion arrived accompanied with a very techno music. This may have been enough to make it stand out from the rest of the tableaux. Sadly, there was not much else in the tableau. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">15. Speaking of music, the background score for the tableau for AYUSH medicine was a complete contrast from the modern beats of the Make In India tableau. It totally reminded you of the public welfare commercials shown on DD. Though I was glad that AYUSH medicine had a representation, considering a lot more people go for Ayurved and Homeopathy than care to admit, I wish they would've used a more catchy and less preachy song to promote this branch of medicine. Same goes for all other ministries, and for the troupes that danced to celebrate Mangalyaan or Swachchh Bharat Abhiyaan. </span></div>
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">16. The "Beti Bachao" tableau was followed by the "Jan Dhan Yojana" tableau. The commentator remarked that if you have a "Ghar ki Lakshmi", real "Lakshmi" will definitely follow. Cheesy as it was, it could be effective in changing the perception of people who see girls as a liability. But wouldn't it still be sad?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">17. As the recipients of this year's Bravery Awards came by, I felt glad that we do something like this, awarding bravehearts from obscure places in India. On digging a little deeper (read referring to the Wiki page), I found out that the first such awards were given in 1958 after Jawahar Lal Nehru witnessed a young boy save lives of hundreds of people in a fire that broke out in Ramlila Grounds during a performance. This was when Nehru decided to felicitate such courage.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">18. I wonder who conceived the idea to hold such a parade every year on Republic Day. Was it a tradition for another occasion that was handed down to us by the British? Or was there someone who thought that several years after India became a republic, Indians would need something to stay connected to the spirit of the day, and to each other, diverse as we are? Seriously, an answer to this will be very much welcome.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcvgRuecb82TDvv8rDa4kcgzCKyeEOh_NjupdTC8LhvFmsCpRQJtW5DNH8vyBq0D3peGsL4BPWOZ66i8L2oZVMSBu4acSCskvGMyQ3-xuW91woZ1gmrpiNN0FdcA97nXem2zNSAxX1NxbI/s1600/rd3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcvgRuecb82TDvv8rDa4kcgzCKyeEOh_NjupdTC8LhvFmsCpRQJtW5DNH8vyBq0D3peGsL4BPWOZ66i8L2oZVMSBu4acSCskvGMyQ3-xuW91woZ1gmrpiNN0FdcA97nXem2zNSAxX1NxbI/s1600/rd3.jpg" height="260" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">19. As the parade commenced with the National Anthem, I couldn't help but admire how easily it infuses patriotism into everyone, whether it is on a national holiday, in a school assembly or a movie theater. Maybe we have just been conditioned to feel so over the years, or maybe everyone just pretends for a while so as not to offend anyone. Whatever it is, for 52 seconds, it seems to hold everyone together. And given point no. 11, I think it does a lot!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">20. </span><span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A constant theme in my mind was how all our patriotism and unity suddenly surfaces on Republic Day and Independence Day, while we keep trying to bring each other down the rest of the year. My cynicism was however diluted when I remembered an incident that happened when Modi was visiting Pune. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; text-align: left;">I was going somewhere with a couple of friends in an auto, and stuck in traffic, we were waiting for Modi's cavalcade to leave so that the roadblock is removed. Suddenly,some 4-5 motorcyclists furiously started blasting their horns. It turned out, there was an ambulance behind them, and it couldn't move ahead. By creating a ruckus with the horns, the motorcyclists made all two wheeler drivers ahead of them move into tiny spaces between the cars. Suddenly, an autowallah appeared, and like a deft traffic cop, directed the cars to make a path for the ambulance. Now, there was just one car in front of the ambulance and it could have easily used the newly formed path to move ahead with the ambulance, but the man who was driving the car parked it somewhere on the footpath, allowing the ambulance to go first. The ambulance moved ahead, and within a couple of minutes, the traffic also dissolved. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; text-align: left;">Nobody knows if it made it in time, and probably no one even cared. But they cared enough to get into action when there was a need. Not all of us can take up the bigger issues facing the country, not all of us have the passion to do so, but if we care and act when it is required, I think we'll be good. This republic, let's just be a good public.</span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">While Independence Day is a reminder of how we became a free country, Republic Day is a salute to where we are taking this free country. And though things may not be perfect, the parade often reminds us that we are getting there, and that we have a rich heritage and vast resources to take us there. Happy Republic Day. Jai Hind. </span></span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-86727970616403801172014-12-10T06:26:00.002-08:002014-12-10T06:26:33.659-08:00#YaarKiShaadi<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The past month, I was facing what
I would like to call a terrible case of writer’s block, when my attention was
drawn to the unusual and alarming number of people from my Facebook friends
list getting married. The wedding season is here, and the difference this time
is that a lot of college seniors of my time are getting hitched, one of whom is
my closest friend.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It has been a good 6 years since
I last attended a wedding, thanks to the definite clash between exam season and
wedding season. My memories of the last wedding I attended involve waiting for
the chaat stall to open, and for the shagun distribution ceremony. There’s also
a faint recollection of a pretty simple Joota-churai event and the
disappointment of not dancing in the Baraat. Probably the most fun that I had
as a kid in a wedding was in a friend’s aunt’s wedding, which was held in our
colony, and all of us friends danced like crazy on the DJ floor, a literal case
of “Begaani shaadi mein Abdullah deewana”. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So I am pretty much out-of-touch
with whatever new trends have come into wedding mainstream since Band Baaja
Baraat. Photo-ops have become quite common I am told, and so has the trend of
the groom helping the bride onto the stage during Jaymaal, borrowing from the
English sitcom style of weddings, romantic as it is. I also heard that rotating
stages and huge screens for live streaming the ceremonies are quite a rage too.
Nevertheless, I am excited about the only one that I am actually going to
attend, hopefully. And this excitement came about after a pretty long time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Let me first give you a
background of the happy couple. The bride is my friend, philosopher and guide
since the time my only major worry in life was getting done with the homework.
She also went on to become my college and department senior. The groom is this
awesome batch-mate of hers she used to rave about over the phone even before I
entered college and is also my society senior in an oddly contrived way. Theirs
is one of the most well-known love stories of our campus.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">In my group of school-friends,
the full acceptance of our best friend going over to the other side came with
all the seven emotional stages of change. When my friend - let’s call her Minny, the Great – first told me that her parents have met with the parents of
her fiancée` and she might get married in less than a couple of years, I
laughed it off, arguing that they have just met, and she has just graduated,
and there’s still time as she is the youngest in the family. And more than
anything else, she is what – just a year older- to us. Those were the
unmistakable signs of <b>denial</b>, soon
followed by the <b>realization</b> that it
is happening, the day she told me to save the date. I still remember how dazed
with the news I was when I told my mom about it, and was amazed, and a little annoyed, at how
naturally she took it, asking me to congratulate Minny, the Great. That is when
the <b>resistance</b> kicked in.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Another school-friend of mine and
I declared, “Dude, it is child marriage. You need maturity to handle a
marriage”. We realized as soon as we had said this, that Minny, the Great had
been far more mature than her years, even as a kid, and if there were any
children in our group, it were just the two of us. We tried to reason with her,
and appealed to her feminism. We reminded her of all her old crushes, quickly
realizing that this strategy will do opposite of what we want. We finally <b>let go</b> when she showed us a picture of
her trousseau.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Now that there was no going back,
we decided to ensure that she is making the right choice by <b>scrutinizing</b> her fiancée`. Now, I knew
that there wasn’t a simpler and sweeter guy in our college, and definitely in
her batch. But I considered it my sisterly duty to interrogate and warn this
poor chap in true big-brother style of how well he is going to take care of
her. This really mature guy happily obliged us with the most romantic answers
and won the ultimate approval of her best friends, long after he had won the
approval of her parents.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As I <b>analyzed</b> what this wedding really meant, I couldn’t help feel
elated for Minny, the Great. Here was this great woman, the kindest one I had
met, and she found this great guy, and they saw to it that they stick together,
whatever be the odds that actually came their way. It is inspiring, really, in
this age when it is cool to be a lost and confused twenty-something, they found
something of value and honored it, and that is a wonderful reason to get
married. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">For us girlfriends now, the
wedding is all about train reservations, sangeet rehearsals, Saree selections,
extensive diet plans (at which I am failing miserably) and all that girly
stuff. My best friend’s wedding should be the most perfect wedding to attend
after so long an interval, and I get to be a part of both the bride and groom’s
parties. But it is also about the realization that we are growing up, and it’s
great that we are still there in each other’s lives, in these important stages.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congratulations Mrs. And Mr. Minny, the Great. May you have the happy ever after.</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-57980254262499788302014-11-02T13:12:00.000-08:002014-11-02T13:19:57.502-08:00The King of Hearts<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This week's blog is dedicated to the very first love of my life, whose looks and charm defined the minimum requirements that all my future crushes had to fulfill, whose wit and confidence is enviable and who entered his 50th year yesterday - the King of Hearts, Shah Rukh Khan!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My infatuation with SRK dates back to when I was a 4 year old, and my favorite songs to perform in front of doting relatives were "Ye Kali Kali Aankhein" and "Jati hun Main, Jaldi Hai Kya". I am told that I used to cry every time SRK was beaten up by a villain in a movie, and that used to happen a lot. Like many kids that age, I tried to contort my face into having dimples. Growing up, I tended to crush on guys with dimples. And sure, there was a phase in which I claimed that Aamir was my favorite Khan because he made <air quotes> sensible <air quotes> movies. But eventually I realized that it's important to be true to yourself, and proudly accept that you love seemingly <air quotes> senseless <air quotes> movies such as Om Shanti Om, Chennai Express and Happy New Year, sometimes only because they star SRK. Oh, and Happy New year is absolutely hilarious.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As I skimmed through all TV channels looking desperately for a good SRK movie to watch on his birthday, I thought about my favorite movies of his, the ones I could watch any time, from any point of the story, any number of times. They do not include some of his more celebrated performances such as Baazigar, Darr (I don't remember watching them, and some SRK fan clubs would disown me for that), Dil To Pagal Hai, or Kal Ho Na Ho. But they entertain you, and I guess that's what SRK is all about! So here are my favorite 9, do watch them if you haven't yet, they will leave you feeling great!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Baadshah</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ-kLyeg9nfnKaKfgYVnDQP4zuhLZlp5Td8MrPdXutN8xCqrrQCbxuOy0EKzBitEQd-cxbFNUtppJGES958cFXvs-03_lqk8dDWQXwUMskmXb8Ny4rzGx85APSSZuyFABzG5T1Ifba4UVM/s1600/bdsha.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ-kLyeg9nfnKaKfgYVnDQP4zuhLZlp5Td8MrPdXutN8xCqrrQCbxuOy0EKzBitEQd-cxbFNUtppJGES958cFXvs-03_lqk8dDWQXwUMskmXb8Ny4rzGx85APSSZuyFABzG5T1Ifba4UVM/s1600/bdsha.jpg" height="200" width="157" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This movie was inspired by a lot of Hollywood movies, <i style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">Nick of Time</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">Rush Hour</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">If Looks Could Kill</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">,</span><i style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">Mr Nice Guy</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">The Mask</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">.</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">A comedy about a detective called Baadshah, who foils an assassination attempt at a Chief Minister, using gadgetry like sunglasses through which you can see through clothes or shoes that allow you to walk on walls, this movie was a kid's paradise, especially with the song "Main to hun pagal", and SRK's antics in it. "Wo Ladki Jo" and "Hum to Deewane" were other great songs. </span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;">Abhijeet had given voice to SRK in all songs in the movie, as was the case in most movies at the time, and I truly believe that it was one of the better actor-singer combinations in Bollywood.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #252525; line-height: 22.3999996185303px; text-align: left;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 22.3999996185303px;"><b>Yes Boss</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 22.3999996185303px;">This was the story of Rahul (surprise, surprise!) , who kissed his boss's ass to no end, and managed his multiple extra-marital affairs in order to earn more, only to fall for one of the boss's girlfriends. Frankly, it was a pretty ordinary story, but still a nice entertainer. The Abhijeet-SRK magic was to be found here too (Main Koi Aisa Geet, Bas Itna Sa Khwab, Jaata Hai Tu Kahan), as was the SRK-Juhi chemistry. I know I am going to hurt a lot of sentiments when I say this, but I truly believe that these two had a much better timing and chemistry than SRK-Kajol.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 22.3999996185303px;">This one had SRK and Juhi play two competitive, TRP-hungry reporters who stumble upon the story of a man sentenced to death for killing a politician who had raped his daughter, and try to help him, going against the nexus of politicians and media houses. Though the plot seems serious, the movie had a generous amount of comedy and romance, and some fun songs. The debut production of Khan,Juhi and Aziz Mirza's production company, it was actually a flop at the box office.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 22.3999996185303px;">You would think that casting the two most beautiful people of Bollywood as siblings, and casting them opposite Priya Gill and Chandrachur Singh would be a big mistake. But this flick went on to prove that what matters more is a good story and strong performances. SRK as a Goan gang leader was a big departure from his usual characters, and his effortless performance in this one proved his mettle as an actor. Again, I am in love with the music of this movie, and am beginning to think that Anu Malik composed really beautiful songs if they were for an SRK movie.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Even though I would hardly ever admit it, I do like DDLJ, regressive as I find some aspects of it. Whether it was him playing soccer (was it? or rugby? or who cares?) in the rain , or wooing Kajol in Ruk Ja Ae Dil, helping Himani Shivpuri select a saree, or doing chores in the house of the wedding, SRK had a screen presence that other actors could only aspire to have. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Kabhi Haan Kabhi Na</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Now this is one sweet movie everyone must watch, SRK-fan or not! Shah Rukh played the mouth-organ-playing, navy-cap-wearing, Sunil who keeps trying to tamper his band's lead singer's attempts to woo Anna, the female singer of the band. The movie also had Ashutosh Gowariker in a small role, and you also see the famous Rustam Paori of Munnabhai fame. There was also a wonderfully choreographed song inspired by Boney M's Rasputin. The best part of the movie, though, was that Sunil doesn't get the girl in the end. But as the Don (you have to watch the movie to know) says, life goes on.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Farah Khan's directorial debut had something for everyone: rickshaw-fight scenes for the kids, 70's songs for the parents, a sexy Sushmita Sen for the guys, and a never-been-cuter Shah Rukh Khan for the girls. Some of the college stereotypes, such as the forgetful Principal or the spit-spraying professor, were spot on! The scene where Zayed gifts his mom locks of his hair, or the one in which he enters the library for the first time, or the ones in which Shahrukh serenaded Sushmita were simple comical situations executed to perfection. And for many more scenes like these, MHN gets full marks!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I seriously doubt if there has been made a better sports movie in Bollywood. In the 153 minutes of this movie, it touched upon regional differences among players, the class difference between cricket and hockey, the disdain with which women sportspersons are treated by the sports committees, the ego issues of senior players, the woes of married female players and the haunting past of an ostracized coach. SRK did an impeccable job as Kabir Khan. Even though he was the star of the movie, the rest of the cast held its own and the result was a sports-oriented movie and not a star-oriented movie. Finally, the McDonalds scene always lightens up my day.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b> Swades</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Every time I see this movie, I discover something new to think about. There is a lot to like about this movie. The tussle between the two main leads over Kaveri Amma. The modern girl trying to provide primary education at grassroot level. The Indian origin NASA scientist who slowly adapts to the lifestyle of a small Indian village. The mature love story which doesn't tie the characters down, but allows them to follow their own passions. The admission, that India is not the greatest country in the world. The portrayal of the problems of the country without blaming either the people or the government. Because in the end, it is our country and our people. Apart from these things, the movie boasts of SRK's finest performance, in which the thinking Mohan Bhargav had completely displaced the dimpled star we look for in every movie of his.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A brilliant actor, a smart businessman, a witty star , Shahrukh Khan is rightly called the King of Bollywood. Here's wishing him a great life ahead and hoping we see a lot more of him in the future!</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-2336971842112284432014-10-27T13:36:00.001-07:002014-10-27T13:36:18.389-07:00Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">It's been a long time since I last visited my own blog, and a lot of major things such as graduation, relocation and employment have happened to me since. But what actually compelled me to pick it up again is an interesting thought that I want to share tonight.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As the despair of a cold Monday morning gradually turned into acceptance of two months of all-work-and-no-play, I looked back at the three trips that I made in the month gone by, which not only elongated my perception of a vacation, but also recreated some precious memories.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The first of these trips was to Goa. I had been to Goa before, but this was a triply special trip. My two month internship at Goa was the reason behind the most beautiful summer of my life. So I was glad that I could revisit the place. What was extraordinary was the fact that I went there for a friend's bachelorette, with girlfriends I have known since we hadn't even touched double digits. An all-girls bachelorette trip with school friends is stuff movie such as "Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara" are made of, and it happened for us, complete with the melodrama of the movie! And it wasn't even the spookiest part. Ten years ago, when slam books were a thing, I had put this as my dream tour in my brother's book, something we discovered after the trip happened. Dreams do come true, it seems.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So there we were, 20-something women acting and feeling like gushy high-schoolers. The activities and conversation were in the same vein, just the setting was different. Instead of first crushes, it was about sasurals. Instead of philosofying near the kids' swimming pool, we were contemplating the waves on a beach. The high pitched renditions of Dil Chahta Hai were made in a car rented for a road trip and not on Ladybird cycles. Though a lot of credit for coordinating this trip went to Whatsapp and other social apps, it was the determination of a bunch of girls to make Goa happen that proved that there are some friendships that time and distance couldn't touch.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #4c1130; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Home Sweet Home</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've lived away from home for 5 years, and made several trips home from hostel. But this one, from Pune to sadi Dilli, was different. Having interned in Delhi for 6 months, living conveniently at home, the rebellious streak of college had disappeared and </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">one can safely say that</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> I had become spoiled for comfort and unconditional love. My departure from Delhi was marked with the dramatic realization that I was going to get out of the safe cocoon of family and friends that I had become so accustomed to. Close friends arriving at my doorstep with chocolate cake to bid me goodbye didn't really help with the emotion. And at the end of the day, Delhi is Delhi!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">So when I went home from Pune after two long months of living independently, adjusting with others, managing groceries and utilities and worst of all, handling maids, it was with a lot of confidence, that comes with living on your own, and relief, that there is still beauty and peace in the world. (Someone told me that this relief of going back to home goes on till you have kids coming to your home, relieved that there's beauty and peace in the world.) </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Moreover, there was deep admiration and heartfelt respect for my parents for managing the mundane things of life and making it enjoyable for us. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">So much was different, but it was still the same. At home, it was perfectly okay to prefer Bang Bang over Haider, it was okay to break a fast if mutton biryani is around, and even 10 years later, my brother and I ended up being the only kids our age in parties. Our lives may change by leaps and bounds, but the only thing constant would be the endearing familiarity of home. Our experiences could only make this more valuable.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><span style="color: #4c1130;">Ghar se Dur Wali Diwali</span></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The icing on the cake was a trip to Bengaluru to celebrate Diwali with my brother. A lot of fuss had been made about #GharWaliDiwali this year, but it was not an option for many, including me and my brother. But that didn't deter us from celebrating. We reconnected with relatives we hadn't met in years, met nieces and cousins for the first time, and celebrated Bhai Dooj over a chocolate that we had somehow forgotten to eat. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I also met a couple of college friends. I realized that college life is a rush of events and incidents, most of which will fade from your memory as time passes. But you don't need them to bond with your true friends. I guess what I am trying to say is that I was glad that I went to Bangalore, and had an unconventional Diwali.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Which brings me to the thought that compelled me to write again today. Some relationships in our lives provide a stability that is otherwise not present. They may be your school friends or old college friends. Your memories with them will always be cherished, but you need to show up to recreate those memories in your new circumstances to sustain those friendships. They may be your family, but you need to let your new experiences teach you how truly valuable they are. Change is good, but if you play it well, some important things will stay the same.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">In the same string of thought, I decided to revisit my blog, and refresh it with new perspectives and experiences. And so must you, for any thing that is close to your heart and provides stability to your life, make an effort to enhance your old memories and passions with your new situations. That is the only way of sustaining anything that is good.</span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-41352711170049049752014-01-24T12:59:00.001-08:002014-01-24T13:04:38.868-08:00Musings in the Metro<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The week gone by marked the beginning of my first brush with working in a multi-national, as a part of a 5-month internship program offered by my college. This essentially means that not only do I have to give up the joy of waking up late and forgetting the difference between a weekday and a weekend but also that I have to travel 17 kms one way to reach my office, </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and that too du</span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">ring rush hour. But thanks to the Delhi Metro, the time taken for this one way commute has been almost halved to just 75 minutes. And even though I spend 2.5 hours daily just in trav</span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">elling</span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">, as a friend recently pointed out to me, I do not mind it (yet) since I get ample time to come out of the early morning inertia, and also to contemplate on questions raised by my observations of my fellow commuters. Here are the 5 things that caught my attention so far.</span></div>
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<b style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Tune mujhe pehchana nahin...!</i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whenever I had to wait at the Metro station, I made sure I was standing in a well-lit and crowded part of the station, for safety reasons. In one such scenario, my over-thinking mind brought up the question, "how well would I be able to describe a person to a sketch artiste if I was a witness to a scene significant for a crime?" The next day, I tried to describe the face (and not clothes, because it's easier to remember clothes :P ) of my fellow commuters in the Women's coach of the Metro. It turned out that the more discernible features are the face shape, the complexion, color of hair, shape of nose and lips and the height and body structure of the person. Prominent features such as moles, dimples, chin dimples are also good pointers for describing a person. While this activity seemed tough at the beginning, it became easier with time, though admittedly I took my own sweet time in performing this exercise. The takeaway from this daily Metro ritual was that even though we pray that we do not face any such circumstance, we should be prepared for it. We can't all be Sherlock, but we could be a little more observant.</span></div>
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<b style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Gandi baat...!</i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Delhi Metro is considered the symbol of progress and development. Radio ads for the Indian Govt. mince no words in driving home this point. Personally, I like travelling in the Metro. But sadly, there are no dustbins in any of the Metro premises. This has caused me to end up with too many chocolate and biscuit wrappers in my bag. Surprisingly, the stations are quite clean, though I did spot a couple of chips packets and disposable tea glasses on the tracks. The people of Delhi show immense discipline, responsibility and maturity when it comes to the Metro. However, installing conspicuous dustbins will go a long way in helping commuters who eat/drink on the go and in keeping the stations pristine.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i>Ye chhori badi Drama Queen hai..!</i></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To entertain themselves during the journey, people resort to a variety of activities. Some read books, some play Candy Crush, some catch up on their sleep, some catch up with their friends on the phone. Some listen to Yo Yo Honey Singh, while others either get lost in their own train of thoughts or completely judge everyone else on the train. And then there is the class of people whose favorite pastime is just creating a nuisance value. They would make irritated noises and frustrated faces because they, just like everyone else, don't have enough space to stand in the jam-packed coach. You can hear a lot of "Oh my God!"s and "Excuuuuuse me!"s from these people. All these antics serve no purpose at all, since everyone is in a similar condition and no one is going to budge. For their part, they are just ensuring that their inconvenience is heard, but it would be a lot better for everyone if they make peace with the predicament, just like everyone else has made peace with them.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i>Dauda dauda bhaaga bhaaga sa..!!</i></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A single minute can make a difference when one is in a hurry to reach a destination during the rush hour. A minute is all it takes to ensure that you'll get a red light at every traffic signal. A long queue builds up at the station exit within a minute of a Metro arrival. And if you are at the wrong end of the queue, you might miss your bus, which is why people go in a frenzy to reach the exit first. The queue for men to enter the platform premises sometimes starts at the foot-over bridge itself. But to my relief, in such a situation, the one for women is considerably shorter. This survival instinct of feeling grateful for a shorter line is quite contrary to my prudence when it comes to gender equality. The shorter line represents not just the skewed gender ratio but also the smaller number of working women. I guess that if we are given a legitimate head-start in any race, we won't think twice about the merits of a merit-based system. And it is this natural tendency that makes it all the more crucial that appropriate checks be implemented in any policy that aims to eliminate differences at the start of a race, so that only the needy can take advantage of it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i>Jitna khaya meetha tha, jo haath na aya khatta hai..! :D</i></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On most days, I don't manage to get a seat in the Metro, and travel standing and looking out of the glass windows. One such evening, while I was sulking about the drawbacks of travelling in public transport, a beautiful scene caught my eye. The Metro was on a bridge across a road, which looked like a black sheet with sparkling rubies kept on it. Except that the sparkling rubies were actually the red lights of cars stuck in traffic, hardly moving. It was then that I realized that a thing that had brought joy to me was a state of misery and frustration for the people sitting in those cars. And suddenly, my not getting a seat wasn't really a problem. The saying, "Those who wear the shoe know where it pinches", holds true after all.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The last few days were exciting but they were just the first few days of a long, long time. The Metro might lose its charm in a few weeks but there is no denying its importance in the life of a Delhiite. And while the journey may become a burden some day, it will have enough adventures and life-lessons to compensate for it. </span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3346186400609215930.post-9063739860995092362014-01-02T08:10:00.002-08:002014-01-02T10:42:55.519-08:00My Top 10 Songs of 2013<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">A new year is upon us, and my resolution this year, like every other new year, is to start and maintain a blog. This desire to blog stems from the fact that I like to write and I think too much, and while the repercussions of this tendency have not been pretty so far, here's hoping I'll make something worthwhile out of it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The end of an year calls for lists, and I believe that the most important list for any year is the one about the Top 10 Songs of the year. Back in school, when I was a kid not yet exposed to the amazing world of JEE and engineering, I dreamed about hosting my own year-end special on radio. Though that dream may go unfulfilled, this blog provides a beautiful opportunity to share "My Top 10 Songs of 2013". Also, it makes for a good "New Year" post. So, presenting before you, the ten songs that I could put on loop and not get bored, a glimpse of the gems that stood out in the year of "Saree ka fall" , "Tamanche pe disco", <i>et al.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><b>10. Gulabi </b>(<i>Shuddh Desi Romance)</i></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Music : </b>Sachin-Jiger</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Lyrics : </b>Amitabh Bhattacharya</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>What I like: </b>All the pink! The song and its picturization have a kind of freshness that I found missing in most songs of 2013. I absolutely love the way it has been shot, capturing Rajasthan in all its glory. The entire team was successful in bringing the rosiness and mushiness that people normally associate with the beginning of a romance, just what the song intends to portray.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Others from the album: </b>The remaining songs in the album had a lot of spunk (or was it just Parineeti Chopra doing her act?). I kind of liked <i>Tere Mere Beech Mein</i>, but a large part of it was because I liked to say "<i>gafla</i><i>t</i>" with g from the epiglottis.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>What I like: </b>The strings at the beginning of the song, the unusual lyrics, the powerful chorus, and how beautifully Siddharth Mahadevan has sung the stanzas. It is the perfect "Pick-yourself-up-and-do-some-work" song. </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Siddharth Mahadevan definitely is a singer to watch out for.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Others from the album: </b>The album had a good mix of songs from different genres. My favorites are <i>Mera Yaar </i>for its sweetness, <i>Ghulmil Launda </i>for its jolliness and more importantly, <i>Hawan Kund Maston ka Jhund</i>, for the sheer fun it induces.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Music : </b>Hitesh Sonik</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">What I like: </span>The spirit and enthusiasm of the song, definitely not apparent from the video, which turned out to be a huge disappointment. I love the lyrics, and the freedom and attitude they promote. If the phrase "Be Yourself" needed an anthem, I would have suggested this one.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Others from the album: </span>I had half a mind to replace it with <i>Pad Gaye Ji</i>, because it has brilliant and naughty lyrics and has been sung superbly by Sunidhi Chauhan and KK (I love almost all his songs, for the record). <i>Bas Main Aur Tu </i>is also a very sweet romantic song. Akaash Vani is surely a surprisingly good album.</span></div>
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<span style="color: blue;"><b>7. Khoon Choos Le </b><i>(Go Goa Gone)</i></span></div>
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<b>Music : </b>Sachin-Jiger</div>
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">What I like: </span>The lyrics, the power-packed chorus, the hatred spewed by the song, Vir Das, and the subtle yet deliberate sexual innuendo made in the song. Frankly, I never thought that someone will ever write a song about how nasty Mondays are, and hit bull's eye about the emotions.</div>
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<span style="font-weight: bold;">Others from the album: </span><i>Slowly Slowly </i>is undeniably a popular and fun song, mostly because of "<i>Aisa na kar na kar...mere yaar". </i>But the surprise element of the album is <i>Khushaamdeed, </i>sung superbly by Shreya Ghoshal and shot in the beautiful falls of Netravali in Goa.</div>
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<b style="color: blue;">6. Raanjhanaa hua main tera </b><i style="color: blue;">(Raanjhanaa)</i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Music : </b>A.R. Rehman</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Singers: </span>Jaswinder Singh and Shiraz Uppal</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">What I like: </span>Its simplicity and how it is a typical A.R. Rehman song. As was required by the story, this song is a pure celebration of a lover's homecoming. Of course, Dhanush's screen presence makes it more endearing. So dothe <i>dholak </i>beats.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Others from the album: </span> As was expected from an A.R. Rehman album, Raanjhanaa had a brilliant song for every mood of the movie. The immensely popular <i>Tum Tak </i>has a delightful classical touch, <i>Nazar Laaye Na</i>'s sweetness was only enhanced by the on-screen chemistry of Abhay Deol and Sonam Kapoor, and <i>Piya Milenge</i> was one of the better Sufi offerings this year (<i>Murshid Khele Holi </i>from D-Day being another one). But the song that caught my fancy, apart from the title track, was the rebellious <i>Tu Mun Shuddhi</i>. Clearly. A.R. Rehman can bring out the best in Rabbi Shergill.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><b>5. Shubhaarambh </b><i>(Kai Po Che)</i></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Music : </b>Amit Trivedi</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Lyrics : </span>Swanand Kirkire</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Singers: </span>Shruti Pathak and Divya Kumar</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">What I like: </span>I know that "<i>Nagada Sang Dhol"</i> is everybody's favorite Garba this year, but in my opinion, it can't hold a candle to this one. The way the beat gains pace, as Garbas usually do, how smartly Gujarati phrases have been included, and in general the Feel-Good factor makes it my favorite song for Dandiya since <i>Dholi Taro</i>.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Others from the album: </span>The whole album bursts with positive energy. Both <i style="font-weight: normal;">Manja </i>and <i style="font-weight: normal;">Meethi Boliyaan </i>are your characteristic Amit Trivedi compositions.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><b>4. Yaaram </b><i>(Ek thi Daayan)</i></span></span></span><br />
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<b>Music : </b>Vishal Bhardwaj</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Lyrics : </b>Gulzar</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Singers: </b>Sunidhi Chauhan and Clinton Cerejo</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>What I like: </b>Sunidhi Chauhan's soulful rendition, the gradual increase in the pace of the song, and the magic of Gulzar Saab's words. I seriously doubt that anybody else can relate the passion and devotion of a lover to the mundane things of daily life.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Others from the album: </b>The hauntingly sung <i>Kaali Kaali </i>also makes for a very sensuous number. <i>Tote Ud Gaye </i>is a refreshing wedding song, different from the usual ones. It's a shame that it didn't get more popular. If you listen to the lyrics closely, you'll find more than one muhavara (saying) associated with parrots. That is the unparalleled genius of Gulzar Saab.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><b>3. Mann Mera </b><i>(Table No. 21)</i></span></span></span><br />
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<b>Music : </b>Gajendra Verma</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Lyrics : </b>Aseem Ahmed Abbasi</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Singers: </b>Gajendra Verma</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>What I like: </b>This song was introduced at the beginning of 2013, and I liked it instantly, probably because it was a long time since I heard a new ballad. This song has been composed and sung by Gajendra Verma, the same guy who had actually composed <i>Emptiness. </i>There is another non-movie version of this song available on the internet, but I think that the music arrangement for the movie version is much better. Gajendra Verma, who has also sung a song in the upcoming movie Yaariyan, gives one reason to believe that there will be talent for ballads even after KK.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Others from the album: </b>The album basically has another song and multiple remixes of <i>Mann Mera</i>. The other song <i>O Sajna </i>is nice to hear but not extraordinary.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><b>2. Meri Aashiqui Ab Tum Hi Ho </b><i>(Aashiqui 2)</i></span></span></span><br />
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<b>Music : </b>Mithoon</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Singers: </b>Palak Muchhal and Arijit Singh</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>What I like: </b>The important question is why I choose this version over the insanely celebrated solo <i>Tum Hi Ho </i>by Arijit Singh. The reason is that once you get past the slow prelude, it is not as morose and self deprecating as <i>Tum Hi Ho. </i>The song leaves you feeling happy and you still get to listen to the passionate chorus by Arijit Singh. Palak Muchhal, who was last heard in <i>Lapata </i>from Ek Tha Tiger, has done an impressive job complementing Arijit Singh's baritone.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Others from the album: </b><i>Sunn Raha Hai Na Tu </i>has two versions, one sung by Ankit Tiwari and one by Shreya Ghoshal. Both are moving, but as with <i>Tum Hi Ho,</i> the female version has a positive vibe. With <i>Piya Aaye Na, </i>KK again proves the range of his voice. <i>Chahun Main Ya Na </i>is the only other song that I find worth recommending.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><b>1. Balam Pichkari </b><i>(Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani)</i></span></span></span><br />
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<b>Music : </b>Pritam</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Singers: </b>Shalmali Kholgade and Vishal Dadlani</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>What I like: </b>It is a holi song that doesn't talk about choli but still allows for flirting. The beats and tune are catchy, you are instantly drawn to the dance floor and you can never be bored. Unlike other songs from the album, you have no trouble memorizing the lyrics and singing along. The enthusiasm of Vishal Dadlani, the simple choreography of Remo D'Souza and the impeccable chemistry of Deepika and Ranbir make it an absolute treat to watch.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Others from the album: </b>Almost all songs from the album were loved by everyone. <i>Badtameez Dil, Ghaghra </i>and <i>Dilliwali Girlfriend </i>rocked the charts and the dance floors alike. <i>Kabira </i>and <i>Ilahi </i> provided a much needed balance in this album full of dance-numbers. But what this album did was much more than elate people with good music. It proved that you can have hit music without unnecessary skin show, pelvic thrusts, seductive choreography and vulgar lyrics. Quality doesn't need tantalization, and hopefully, 2014 will have more albums that demonstrate the same spirit.</span></span></div>
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Snigdhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03385441853133113818noreply@blogger.com0